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Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion? (Read 267 times)
Laugh till you cry
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Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:34pm
 
Fat chance!

The UK Navy made a huge mistake when it moved from oars and sail power to mechanical drive for ships.

Loyal oarsmen Grappler and Gnads are waiting to be summoned for service.

Grappler's and Gnads' governors have no balls. The dynamic duo need only two holes in the side and a couple of big lumps of wood to commence their mission.

https://www.rt.com/news/601549-uk-military-problems-worse-healy/

Quote:
UK military problems ‘much worse than thought’ – defense secretary
John Healey has said the army faces “very serious challenges,” according to national media

The British Army, Royal Navy, and Royal Air Force are all struggling with “hollowed out forces, procurement waste, [and] low morale,” British Defense Secretary John Healey has warned.

In a grim assessment of the state of the UK military, Healey told the British Army’s annual Land Warfare Conference in London on Monday that the nation’s armed forces face “very serious challenges,” according to Sky News.

New UK prime minister pledges sharp rise in military spendingREAD MORE: New UK prime minister pledges sharp rise in military spending

“We now also see that these problems are much worse than we thought,” added the defense secretary, who has been in office for just over two weeks as part of the new Labour government.

Healey also said he wants to establish “a new era for UK defense” in the face of “rapidly increasing global threats.”

The new British government launched a thorough defense review earlier this month after Labour’s general election victory. Prime Minister Keir Starmer has insisted that Britain should be better prepared for “a more dangerous and volatile world.”

The government has set out a “roadmap” to spending 2.5% of national income on defense. Britain is a member of NATO, which requires that member states spend at least 2% of GDP on their militaries.

...
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« Last Edit: Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:58pm by Laugh till you cry »  

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Bobby.
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #1 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:40pm
 
The military always wastes money.

Example - a bolt that is not critical in any way that costs say 50 cents from Bunnings
will cost $100 if it's classed as a military item.
The taxpayer just gets ripped off due to all the paperwork and middle men.
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Laugh till you cry
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #2 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:44pm
 
Bobby. wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:40pm:
The military always wastes money.

Example - a bolt that is not critical in any way that costs say 50 cents from Bunnings
will cost $100 if it's classed as a military item.
The taxpayer just gets ripped off due to all the paperwork and middle men.


The managers of the military-industrial complex and their shareholders have hungry families too.

Grappler and Gnads have a hard-earned reputation for being adept at manipulating nuts.
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Bobby.
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #3 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:45pm
 
Laugh till you cry wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:44pm:
Bobby. wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:40pm:
The military always wastes money.

Example - a bolt that is not critical in any way that costs say 50 cents from Bunnings
will cost $100 if it's classed as a military item.
The taxpayer just gets ripped off due to all the paperwork and middle men.


The managers of the military-industrial complex and their shareholders have hungry families too.

Grappler and Gnads have a hard-earned reputation for being adept at manipulating nuts.



I'm not kidding - we're all being ripped off so badly.
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Laugh till you cry
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #4 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:49pm
 
Bobby. wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:45pm:
Laugh till you cry wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:44pm:
Bobby. wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:40pm:
The military always wastes money.

Example - a bolt that is not critical in any way that costs say 50 cents from Bunnings
will cost $100 if it's classed as a military item.
The taxpayer just gets ripped off due to all the paperwork and middle men.


The managers of the military-industrial complex and their shareholders have hungry families too.

Grappler and Gnads have a hard-earned reputation for being adept at manipulating nuts.



I'm not kidding - we're all being ripped off so badly.


The war beast demands so much documentation and certification that each item is accompanied by documents, certificates, and reports which weigh 10x the object being procured.

That is what we see. There may be more activity that is not observed under the table between mates and buddies.

What about the once-shiny, missing balls of Gnads' and Grappler's governors?
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Bobby.
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #5 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:55pm
 
Laugh till you cry wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:49pm:
The war beast demands so much documentation and certification that each item is accompanied by documents, certificates, and reports which weigh 10x the object being procured.

That is what we see. There may be more activity that is not observed under the table between mates and buddies.

What about the once-shiny, missing balls of Gnads and Grappler's governors?



And the suppliers just buy the part from Bunnings anyway and
pretend that it meets all those specs.
Even aircraft are full of Chinese cloned copies of parts - such as integrated circuits -
and no one is any the wiser.
It's a scam.

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Laugh till you cry
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #6 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 2:00pm
 
Bobby. wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:55pm:
Laugh till you cry wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:49pm:
The war beast demands so much documentation and certification that each item is accompanied by documents, certificates, and reports which weigh 10x the object being procured.

That is what we see. There may be more activity that is not observed under the table between mates and buddies.

What about the once-shiny, missing balls of Gnads and Grappler's governors?



And the suppliers just buy the part from Bunnings anyway and
pretend that it meets all those specs.
Even aircraft are full of Chinese cloned copies of parts - such as integrated circuits -
and no one is any the wiser.
It's a scam.



If the USAF was to remove all Chinese parts from its war machines the only thing left would be the ashtrays.

Shunning Chinese goods is an effective no-fly policy for the USAF.
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Please don't thank me. Effusive fawning and obeisance of disciples, mendicants, and foot-kissers embarrass me.
 
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Bobby.
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #7 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 2:06pm
 
Laugh till you cry wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 2:00pm:
Bobby. wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:55pm:
Laugh till you cry wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 1:49pm:
The war beast demands so much documentation and certification that each item is accompanied by documents, certificates, and reports which weigh 10x the object being procured.

That is what we see. There may be more activity that is not observed under the table between mates and buddies.

What about the once-shiny, missing balls of Gnads and Grappler's governors?



And the suppliers just buy the part from Bunnings anyway and
pretend that it meets all those specs.
Even aircraft are full of Chinese cloned copies of parts - such as integrated circuits -
and no one is any the wiser.
It's a scam.



If the USAF was to remove all Chinese parts from its war machines the only thing left would be the ashtrays.

Shunning Chinese goods is an effective no-fly policy for the USAF.



I saw a report once  -
a supplier supplied a whole load of counterfeit parts - integrated circuits -
70% of them failed immediately when used.
The supplier couldn't get the parts from their normal supplier but they found
a heap of them in Hong Kong and imported them -
exact copies on the outside of the genuine parts.
Of course - the supplier never told anyone but they were found out.
The fine print in the contract saved their arse.
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tallowood
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #8 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 2:14pm
 
Would UK be able to use NATO's article 5?
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Reality is a figment of imagination
 
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Laugh till you cry
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #9 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 2:20pm
 
tallowood wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 2:14pm:
Would UK be able to use NATO's article 5?


It would be over before NATO could see UK's signal's of distress from UK's coastal signal fires.

Six Viking men and a boy, conquer England and return after the weekend of rape, pillage and looting including the seizure of the once-shiny balls from Grappler's and Gnads' governors.
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tallowood
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #10 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 3:13pm
 
British have a secret weapon - the fart amplifiers.
...
...

When amplified farts hit the viking fleet it will be scattered like the great armada.
...
Quote:
He blew with His winds, and they were scattered
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chimera
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #11 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 3:23pm
 
Viking and Hamas barbarians raid the monastic hermit kingdom of Charles the Holey. From the sea to the See the bishoprics are on fire, raped and pillaged by jihadis hitting the communion wine.
Who will deliver us from the fury of the musso men?
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Laugh till you cry
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #12 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 6:27pm
 
chimera wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 3:23pm:
Viking and Hamas barbarians raid the monastic hermit kingdom of Charles the Holey. From the sea to the See the bishoprics are on fire, raped and pillaged by jihadis hitting the communion wine.
Who will deliver us from the fury of the musso men?


They evidently f**ked Chimera's mind during their coffee break.
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chimera
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #13 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 6:42pm
 
Laugh till you cry wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 2:20pm:
Six Viking men and a boy, conquer England and return after the weekend of rape, pillage and looting.

Three Hamas men and a laugh cry conquer Scotland.
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Laugh till you cry
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Re: Would UK be able to repel a 2024 Viking invasion?
Reply #14 - Jul 24th, 2024 at 7:26pm
 
chimera wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 6:42pm:
Laugh till you cry wrote on Jul 24th, 2024 at 2:20pm:
Six Viking men and a boy, conquer England and return after the weekend of rape, pillage and looting.

Three Hamas men and a laugh cry conquer Scotland.


Chimera's mind is impervious to truth and facts.
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Please don't thank me. Effusive fawning and obeisance of disciples, mendicants, and foot-kissers embarrass me.
 
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