I have already posted that we are down in Canberra.  Part of the reason is to baby sit Brother's House and two Labradoodles.

It is far king freezing down here.  Minus seven degrees overnight, sort of far king freezing.

So.....yesterday. 

The mower man is due, and I get a text from Sister-in-Law asking if I'd go out into the yard and pick up pooch poo.  So, I sent back, 'No.'  Just one word, "No."

Sure enough, within the short time I anticipated, my phone goes off.  Brother.  I answer.  Before he could say a word, "Well, that did not take long, right on schedule."  That took all the wind out of his sails.  Two steps ahead, me.

So, end result, out of some deference to the poor bastard who has to mow in these miserable conditions, I agree to pick up pooch poo.  And did.  Need not have bothered, pissing down with rain, freezing cold rain, so no mower man.

*Drum roll.*  Today. 

It is the day the same pampered pooches have to go off for their periodic grooming.  I have to deliver and pick up.

Wednesday, 25th June, 2025, Canberra.  Phaaaaark, same freezing rain and blowing almost a gale, cold as.

I have instructions from Sister in Law about some seat overprotecting thing that needs to be installed in her Space Ship Enterprise (Tesla) so the car is not soiled by her far king pooches.

Ok.  I locate that.  Bloody thing is still in the packet, never opened, obviously never used.  Great!  Just far king great.

So, I get that installed with the tethering stuff all set up so the Law is complied with.

Time to leave.  Bung two far king Labradoodles on their leashes and we approach the Star Ship Far King Enterprise.  Far king pooches will not go within yards of the bloody thing, and it is pissing down rain/sleet, blowing like a bastard, as already described. 

Saving grace, I am still in the double garage under cover, as are pooches and said Space Ship.

Drag pooches towards car.  They are far king terrified, literally shaking.

Light bulb moment. 

Sister in Law has never ever had these things in her car before.  Clearly, Brother has been doing the previous traveling to and from grooming in his bloody Range Rover, which they are using to go swanning, caravanserai.

There I am.  Two terrified pooches, quivering, not going willingly anywhere near the Tesla.

Far kit. 

I pick up the fat one, and basically toss her in the back seat, which is protected with that thing.  She stays in!  Yay.  Grab the male, skinnier one and toss him in. Remember, to get them to even anywhere near the far king Musk car, I had to have them leased and I am gently pulling, until it was obvious they were not going any further without being picked up.

So, now I have them in the back seat and they are still quivering as they have never been there before.  Thanks SIL! 

To tether them.

Phaaaark me!  Neither of the bastards would stay still long enough for me to get the tether clipped to their collars!

Far kit.  I shut door, go back upstairs, grab some treats and back to the struggle I go.  Treats work, and they settle long enough for me to get the tethers on, so we can exit the far king garage.  That we do, and out into the far king blizzard like conditions.  Great.

Drive to grooming joint.  Blizzard like conditions still prevailing, and nearest I can park is about 50 meters from grooming joint.

I'll spare you the details.  I drop them off.  Far king hell.

Now, I have to wait for a phone call from grooming mob to get me to pick them up.  I knew it was going to be some hours so, off we went for some lunch.

About four hours later, no phone call, and weather has fined up.  No rain, no wind, scattered clouds.

Far kit, I am going back while weather is better, and I did.  Just as I was about 500 meters away, they rang, saying pooches have been pampered, ready.  Great.

In I go, and out they come, all smelling nicely and trimmed up. 

"That be $300.00."


Pphaaaaaaaark me!  Bro and SIL are not short of a quid and I had expected they would have pre-paid or had an account, but nah.....I hand $300.00 over.  Phaaaarrk! #$%$@*&^(&%$  Pissed off.

Now, we are approaching the Space Ship, and I open the back door with two pooches pulling on their leads not wanting to be anywhere near there.  FMD, fatty jumps in!  Yay.  Now for the thinner male.  I have his leash in my hand and look down.  The bastard is not at the other end!!!!!!  The empty collar is there.  He had been shorn so much that he had been able to slip the far king collar.

Far kit!!!!!

So, now I have one in the back seat and the other one.....some far king where, and I am really, really pissed off!!!!!

Look around and there the prick is on the road with traffic moving all around him and he clearly has no idea, WTF.

Jayzuz!  No choice.  Out I go into the Canberra traffic and thank uck, Canberrans have some level of smarts and they see the dilemma.  Traffic on both sides stop, the pooch is now very still, and allowed me to grab him, and return to Space Ship.  While holding pooch, I manage to open rear door, the other pooch stayed in and the runaway was plopped in.  Tethered the pricks up, and farked off, furious.

I don't give a flying bugger how long those relations of mine are on their caravanserai, I am not taking those pampered pooches anywhere in that Space Ship Enterprise ever, ever ever again.

Far cough!!!!

(Now, I feel a whole a whole lot better.)

Shovel or bag?

MeisterEckhart wrote on Jun 25^th, 2025 at 11:44pm:


Dumb me.

Ever see the movie The Right Stuff, where Denis Quaid mentions the act of "poking the pooch" ?