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Its time
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This is why – in his sixth decade of political journalism – Laurie Oakes remains on top.
"You're in a hole, politically," he told prime minister Malcolm Turnbull on 60 Minutes last night.
"Your popularity dived last year. You almost lost an election. You're still behind in the polls. I assume you don't think that's entirely down to Bill Shorten's brilliance? Have you thought about why it's happened?"
It was compellingly awkward – Turnbull's incensed micro-expressions were something to behold – but that's not what made this a great interview.
Without breaking a sweat, Oakes illuminated the contrast between Turnbull's "helping the disadvantaged" rhetoric and his government's commitment to public health. He knew exactly where to push on Australia's relationship with the US. Then he left the prime minister inexplicably shilling for sympathy about the Liberal Party's depleted coffers.
"It's a big challenge that we face," Turnbull lamented. "The corporate sector ... are much more reluctant to make political donations to anybody."
Millions of viewers – their livelihoods ravaged by the corporate sector – wept at this cruel state of affairs.
© Screenshot I think my expression sums it up, but I'll say it anyway: 'You're in a hole, politically.'
When I first met Oakes, more than a year ago, most commentators had dismissed Trump. Oakes, however, believed he was popular for a reason: he articulated economic anxieties of certain voters. Of course, his "solutions" were patently bigoted and non-sensical. "To me, he's a pretty ugly customer," Oakes stressed.
But Trump was a contrast to many Australian politicians "who have forgotten how to communicate with voters ... people are sick of spin, sick of talking points, sick of politicians on TV every night not answering questions.
"When they see you climb into your high-vis gear and go out and say something meaningless beside a road, they know it's rubbish."
Now consider what Turnbull said last night, in response to Oakes' question about the future of the government.
Turnbull: "We need to ensure that we remain and become even more so a strong prosperous first-world economy with a generous social welfare safety net. Great opportunities; but also the ability to afford to help those who fall behind or stumble, or are disadvantaged. We we've got to have a strong economy to pay for that. And that means we need to press ahead with opening up more markets, more trade. We need to encourage more investment. That's why we've got a plan to reduce business taxes. We've got a big defence industry plan, investing an unprecedented amount in the most advanced manufacturing and technologies in the world. All of that will drive massive growth."
For those of you who are still awake, this bit-of-everything answer suggests tax cuts will support a stronger safety net because GROWTH, somehow. In other words, trickle-down economics does work. Just hold on a bit longer, folks.
© Screenshot/Nine Wait - was that question a dig at Bill Shorten or me?
By this point, Oakes practically handed Turnbull a high-vis vest in the form of his next question: You were furious about Labor's 'Mediscare' campaign, but you conceded the Coalition's past action's created the conditions to make it possible. John Howard gave his health minister more money to change perceptions. Will you do the same?
Turnbull said he's spending more than any previous government, but it's equally important to reduce the deficit.
"So more money?" Oakes demanded.
Again, Turnbull tied himself in knots by promising only "more value" and "bang from the taxpayer's buck".
This is Oakes' skill; knowing precisely how much rope to give, when to move on, and when to press for more. His cool demeanour usually prevents indignant theatrics from his subjects, lest they look hot-headed by comparison. (Most wear fixed smiles to conceal their fear; you could virtually see Turnbull's aides tugging at his upper lip with hooks and fishing wire to keep him grinning.) Most importantly, his 52 years covering politics gives him an an near-unrivalled knowledge and experience.
"I want to say welcome prime minister Trumbull [sic]," Oakes began, referencing the repeated mispronunciation of his name by Trump's press secretary, Sean Spicer.
Turnbull tried to laugh it off, but Oakes was having none of it.
© Screenshot/Nine What a time to be alive, indeed.
"It's funny but it's a bit offensive, too, isn't it, that the White House spokesman doesn't bother to get your name..."
"The most important thing is results, Laurie," Turnbull replied.
"Let's talk about this brutal phone call that magically became civil, as a result of this presidential tweet. Are you and Donald Trump mates again now?"
Turnbull described their discussion as frank (while mercifully refraining from calling it "robust") and insisted Trump will honour the refugee resettlement deal entered into by Barack Obama. He added that Trump did not hang up on him.
Oakes went on to say that Trump had bullied Turnbull and accused Australia of "having a lend of America", then questioned the implications of Trump "showing no respect for Australia".
When asked if Trump wanted something in return for honouring the refugee deal – such as "troops for some Middle Eastern adventure or ships in the South China Sea" – Turnbull said no.
Oakes: "Trump is different from most presidents. He said recently on the Iraq war, 'We should have kept the oil but okay, we might have another chance.' Now will that
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