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Agnes

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fish dinner

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Bedford Park rnd

Re: C.W.A.
Reply #390 - Sep 7^th, 2015 at 5:47pm

cods wrote on Sep 7^th, 2015 at 5:35pm:

gladys wrote on Sep 7^th, 2015 at 3:27pm:

Cods, you well know how quickly your bowels turn to water when you get over-excited by playing matchmaker.

that is so not true... Glad you really must get your mind back on que...if you keep this up you will start all the girls whingeing they have bowel problems. they think you can catch it...so please decorum at all times....

I just know you are after a date with a handsome man thats all, its the main reason I have encouraged the lads from the toolshed...I know they stop by but they are shy and afraid to come on in...so if they think we have a hussy in the ranks I am sure a few of them will light up like a lighthouse..and join the club we so need new members so think how its all in a good cause .

Dont forget if we have square dancing the more lads we have the better..... dosey doe and all that twirling it will be a hit I know...we need a caller so if anyone is good at it let us know....the pay is lousy but the foods ok...we do have a fiddle player he is the only one that will come back after last years Rio Carnivale we put on..... the rest changed their phone numbers and a couple actually moved away... so we are lucky to have Tim the fiddler..... he does live in a nursing home so not so easy for him to move away... we will need to advise Patrick the Policeman we will be partying so please let me have the numbers so he can organise his roster.....I am not sure what that is about...but I am sure many of the lads will want to work that shift...so we need to give him plenty of notice..

I am sure pansi will be back by then.lets hope she isnt too worn out from all this travel..... did I mention I was going to make big fancy skirts to twirl around in...just like you see on those hillbilly videos...so I can make to order I have this beautiful check lycra..all shiny and sexy..... I know pansi will want one...and have made it in bright orange its all the rage this season I was told that by this nice little Chinese man I bumped into off the Melb Markets.. such a nice man he helped put the rolls in the back of the car for no extra cost..... he did say I would have enough to make shorts and shirts for the lads..... what do you think agnes..????...

Oh the square dancing night sounds to die for cods-if youwill be making my out fit if you just go with an elastic waist in the skirt that would save me changing into my trackie dacks mid evening...I tend to blow up a lot due to all the gas in the mead.

The colours, I loooove bright colours, so yes if you need a hand just give me an oooiiii and I will bring over my sewing kit and a bottle of Jacks(whiskey) warms the cockles that does , makes the time fly when your having fun with a hit of good old of Jacks.
You have the best ideas going cods- on a more mundane note- the trivia night may have to be postponed- the girls say the refreshments are boring and they have clean run out of ideas , how does that happen?

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« Last Edit: Sep 7^th, 2015 at 6:26pm by Agnes »

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cods

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Re: C.W.A.
Reply #391 - Sep 7^th, 2015 at 7:23pm

Agnes wrote on Sep 7^th, 2015 at 5:47pm:

cods wrote on Sep 7^th, 2015 at 5:35pm:

gladys wrote on Sep 7^th, 2015 at 3:27pm:

Cods, you well know how quickly your bowels turn to water when you get over-excited by playing matchmaker.

that is so not true... Glad you really must get your mind back on que...if you keep this up you will start all the girls whingeing they have bowel problems. they think you can catch it...so please decorum at all times....

I just know you are after a date with a handsome man thats all, its the main reason I have encouraged the lads from the toolshed...I know they stop by but they are shy and afraid to come on in...so if they think we have a hussy in the ranks I am sure a few of them will light up like a lighthouse..and join the club we so need new members so think how its all in a good cause .

Dont forget if we have square dancing the more lads we have the better..... dosey doe and all that twirling it will be a hit I know...we need a caller so if anyone is good at it let us know....the pay is lousy but the foods ok...we do have a fiddle player he is the only one that will come back after last years Rio Carnivale we put on..... the rest changed their phone numbers and a couple actually moved away... so we are lucky to have Tim the fiddler..... he does live in a nursing home so not so easy for him to move away... we will need to advise Patrick the Policeman we will be partying so please let me have the numbers so he can organise his roster.....I am not sure what that is about...but I am sure many of the lads will want to work that shift...so we need to give him plenty of notice..

I am sure pansi will be back by then.lets hope she isnt too worn out from all this travel..... did I mention I was going to make big fancy skirts to twirl around in...just like you see on those hillbilly videos...so I can make to order I have this beautiful check lycra..all shiny and sexy..... I know pansi will want one...and have made it in bright orange its all the rage this season I was told that by this nice little Chinese man I bumped into off the Melb Markets.. such a nice man he helped put the rolls in the back of the car for no extra cost..... he did say I would have enough to make shorts and shirts for the lads..... what do you think agnes..????...

Oh the square dancing night sounds to die for cods-if youwill be making my out fit if you just go with an elastic waist in the skirt that would save me changing into my trackie dacks mid evening...I tend to blow up a lot due to all the gas in the mead.

The colours, I loooove bright colours, so yes if you need a hand just give me an oooiiii and I will bring over my sewing kit and a bottle of Jacks(whiskey) warms the cockles that does , makes the time fly when your having fun with a hit of good old of Jacks.
You have the best ideas going cods- on a more mundane note- the trivia night may have to be postponed- the girls say the refreshments are boring and they have clean run out of ideas , how does that happen?

I know what you mean coming up with new things to do is a problem and I for one am sick of the whingeing..its always the same ones have you noticed that?...trivia was always good but of course they had to think.. something they dont do too often.. as we know its all about them.. its the age you see...pitiful...
god I hope I dont get like them...I mean look at Glad you would think she would lap up a bloke wanting to take her out wining and dining... she has spent so long hiding in cupboards she has forgotten how to kick her heels up...I might add I had to bribe GMonk to take her out....he said he would send us the Bill I am still waiting for that to arrive....I tell you if she went for the oysters I will crack her one...I know what G.monk is like he shows off a bit...and when he isnt paying hes worse...pansi will not be amused when she sees the finances I can promise...

I have your outfit all in mind agnes...it will stand out a treat not that you need any assistance in that dept.. Wink

.. all the lads want a date with you.. but I said you would pick your own so play hard to get dear they are all a push over...mind you I do think your cake making has sucked them all in....they talk of little else......

as you say boring...

so when we get a caller for the square dancing we will be into it...Mavis has already lined up new wheels for her walker...if she come crashing in to me this time I might let her have one as well...you can tell I have had a bad day.. its been rush rush...fetching and carrying...and avoiding the rent man... he is pretty fast that guy....unless they have a new one of course...might get my roller blades out of the menders I think I will be needing them..

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Agnes

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fish dinner

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Bedford Park rnd

Re: C.W.A.
Reply #392 - Sep 7^th, 2015 at 7:46pm

It will be alright on the night cods-and the punch will have to be watered down a bit too- Maud is a silly as a wheel when she is full as a butchers pup- you cant trust her when she is like that I tell you, old Ron had to be put in adult daycare last knees up we had, he suffered terrible tauma- she groped him all night then and pinned him down cos he wouldnt give her another ladle full..Maud!!!

AUSSIE is always perving on the CWA thread- he spends a lot of time in here- wish he would just get himself a wife or something, he might not have so much time to burn.

I have to get dinner going now- nothing exciting- just Mylanta and chocolate custard

Ps. Cods all that excess bright orange check lycra that the chinese con man sold you at the markets- if we have any over we can make new lycra curtains for the mens loo's and the vestibule needs brightening up to I think.. and maybe also some matching hair accessories for the girls outfits..? they will look well tizzy in that get up.

Also saw Margie driving in earlier- she is on training for her loo cleaning duties, she is timing herself , she is used to doing that she said, old habits die hard- left over from her loo cleaning days of her youth many years ago-

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« Last Edit: Sep 8^th, 2015 at 7:57am by Agnes »

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strolling bones

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Re: C.W.A.
Reply #393 - Sep 8^th, 2015 at 8:09am

Yes indeed my dear that was me , just getting in some loo cleaning practice you see. I went through the motion's last night as build up for this morning's trial run and I must say I made very good time..maybe I could also give some credit to my morning constitutional of tea with a rather healthy dash of brandy. Schrodinger won't come near me if he smells brandy and leaves my tea alone, another positive! I think I am on track to beat my own personal best. It's looking very good I must say.

I have written down my measurements for my skirt cods and left it on the office desk. Can you believe I have the same measurements I did when I won Kick Boxing Champion Ship in 1937 at the St Mary Mead Show. I wore a skirt for that match,it allowed for a much greater range of movement, the men there appreciated my performance with much enthusiasm.

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« Last Edit: Sep 8^th, 2015 at 8:31am by strolling bones »

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Jovial Monk Gold Member Offline Dogs not cats! Posts: 50003 Gender:	Re: C.W.A. Reply #394 - Sep 8^th, 2015 at 5:40pm Couple of zingers there: Quote: I have to get dinner going now- nothing exciting- just Mylanta and chocolate custard bwahahahaha Poor old Marge practising cleaning the toilets “going through the [bowel] motions”
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gladys

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Re: C.W.A.
Reply #395 - Sep 8^th, 2015 at 10:29pm

Jovial Monk wrote on Sep 8^th, 2015 at 5:40pm:

Couple of zingers there:

Poor old Marge practising cleaning the toilets “going through the [bowel] motions” Grin

Mr. George Monk, did you not complain about your bowels constantly during our *date,* leaving me alone at the restaurant table numerous times while you relieved yourself? I only pray that the person who followed you flushed the toilet before using it. Margie's superior loo-cleaning skills would most certainly have been put to good use! Cods, really, are "The Bowels of Hell" the best matchmaking you can do? A man that needs an adult nappy is not my idea of a "catch."

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Jovial Monk Gold Member Offline Dogs not cats! Posts: 50003 Gender:	Re: C.W.A. Reply #396 - Sep 8^th, 2015 at 10:51pm Hmmm Glad, little bit of transference going on there. Wasn’t me running to the loo—that was some guy you dated before me and you got us muddled up you silly sausage!
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gladys Full Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 208 Gender:	Re: C.W.A. Reply #397 - Sep 8^th, 2015 at 11:01pm Jovial Monk wrote on Sep 8^th, 2015 at 10:51pm: Hmmm Glad, little bit of transference going on there. Wasn’t me running to the loo—that was some guy you dated before me and you got us muddled up you silly sausage! My mind is as tight as your bowels are loose, sir! Goodnight and Goodbye!
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Jovial Monk Gold Member Offline Dogs not cats! Posts: 50003 Gender:	Re: C.W.A. Reply #398 - Sep 8^th, 2015 at 11:15pm It was Glad dropping SBD’s all night, phew!
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AiA Gold Member Offline Posts: 18405 Gender:	Re: C.W.A. Reply #399 - Sep 9^th, 2015 at 5:44am Agnes, when will you be giving your CWA talk, "Release Your Inner Wild Man and the Secrets of French Sex Appeal?"
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cods

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Re: C.W.A.
Reply #400 - Sep 9^th, 2015 at 7:30am

goodness me the chat has dropped a level or two in the CWA turn my back for 5 min and look what happens..

boys I will have to ask you to behave in the hallowed halls of the good old CWA.....we do try to all make allowances for each other at the club as we all have some dreadful faults that we would rather not talk about in public... we have to remember a few of our girls get a bit over excited when the talk gets .. shall we say "grubby" Grace is a sweety but she does go back to her days as a stripper every once in a while..so please tone it down..pansi will be back soon and she will deal with you very harshly if theres no improvement she may even got rid of myself by claiming I have let the club fall into the hands of dirty old men..so decorum at all times lads please...

aia agnes is giving a chat on the the Sexual Habits of the famous Alice Springs bobtailroos that are endangered they have not procreated for 5 years and no one knows why...she is studying them in Uni... and wants to share what she is doing to encourage them to fall in love.....with the CWA she sits up most nights looking for ways to encourage this dying species to get on with it...I find that very honorable and the girls will enjoy the videos I am sure...you are most welcome to come to the chat.

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Ex Dame Pansi

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Re: C.W.A.
Reply #401 - Sep 9^th, 2015 at 11:26am

cods wrote on Sep 9^th, 2015 at 7:30am:

goodness me the chat has dropped a level or two in the CWA turn my back for 5 min and look what happens..

boys I will have to ask you to behave in the hallowed halls of the good old CWA.....we do try to all make allowances for each other at the club as we all have some dreadful faults that we would rather not talk about in public... we have to remember a few of our girls get a bit over excited when the talk gets .. shall we say "grubby" Grace is a sweety but she does go back to her days as a stripper every once in a while..so please tone it down..pansi will be back soon and she will deal with you very harshly if theres no improvement she may even got rid of myself by claiming I have let the club fall into the hands of dirty old men..so decorum at all times lads please...

aia agnes is giving a chat on the the Sexual Habits of the famous Alice Springs bobtailroos that are endangered they have not procreated for 5 years and no one knows why...she is studying them in Uni... and wants to share what she is doing to encourage them to fall in love.....with the CWA she sits up most nights looking for ways to encourage this dying species to get on with it...I find that very honorable and the girls will enjoy the videos I am sure...you are most welcome to come to the chat.

I am shocked!

Cods.......I will be calling an extraordinary general meeting when I get back, members only.

I will be putting a motion forward Shocked

that the men will not come into the hall, except for special occasions, we gave them a chance out of the goodness of our hearts and they took advantage of it.

Maud wrote me and said the elastic broke in her pants, they slipped down to her ankles and one of the men grabbed them sending her sprawling across the floor..........he was last seen bolting across the football field with the pants blowing like a parasail above his head.

Do you know about this cods?

I think the men should be relegated to outside duties, the door keeper, maintaining the fish pond and the garden, but of course we will vote on it.

I promised them Viagra, but they won't be getting any now, they've brought the reputation of the club to its knees.

But don't worry cods, you did your best and we will get our good name back.

Don't forget to put the mead on ice, we're going to have a big bash.....I got the duty free Bolly and some other fancy coolers.....see if you can round up a Bob Marley-like performer......even if we have to pay him for the night.

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"When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace." Hendrix
andrei said: Great isn't it? Seeing boatloads of what is nothing more than human garbage turn up.....

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cods

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Re: C.W.A.
Reply #402 - Sep 9^th, 2015 at 1:32pm

Ex Dame Pansi wrote on Sep 9^th, 2015 at 11:26am:

cods wrote on Sep 9^th, 2015 at 7:30am:

goodness me the chat has dropped a level or two in the CWA turn my back for 5 min and look what happens..

boys I will have to ask you to behave in the hallowed halls of the good old CWA.....we do try to all make allowances for each other at the club as we all have some dreadful faults that we would rather not talk about in public... we have to remember a few of our girls get a bit over excited when the talk gets .. shall we say "grubby" Grace is a sweety but she does go back to her days as a stripper every once in a while..so please tone it down..pansi will be back soon and she will deal with you very harshly if theres no improvement she may even got rid of myself by claiming I have let the club fall into the hands of dirty old men..so decorum at all times lads please...

aia agnes is giving a chat on the the Sexual Habits of the famous Alice Springs bobtailroos that are endangered they have not procreated for 5 years and no one knows why...she is studying them in Uni... and wants to share what she is doing to encourage them to fall in love.....with the CWA she sits up most nights looking for ways to encourage this dying species to get on with it...I find that very honorable and the girls will enjoy the videos I am sure...you are most welcome to come to the chat.

I am shocked!

Cods.......I will be calling an extraordinary general meeting when I get back, members only.

I will be putting a motion forward Shocked

that the men will not come into the hall, except for special occasions, we gave them a chance out of the goodness of our hearts and they took advantage of it.

Maud wrote me and said the elastic broke in her pants, they slipped down to her ankles and one of the men grabbed them sending her sprawling across the floor..........he was last seen bolting across the football field with the pants blowing like a parasail above his head.

Do you know about this cods?

I think the men should be relegated to outside duties, the door keeper, maintaining the fish pond and the garden, but of course we will vote on it.

I promised them Viagra, but they won't be getting any now, they've brought the reputation of the club to its knees.

But don't worry cods, you did your best and we will get our good name back.

Don't forget to put the mead on ice, we're going to have a big bash.....I got the duty free Bolly and some other fancy coolers.....see if you can round up a Bob Marley-like performer......even if we have to pay him for the night.

that terrible news pansi I didnt hear about Maud losing her draws.. what a shock for the poor dear..I do hope that wasnt Mr monk he claims he is always a gentleman but I have my doubts we have many damsels in distress its a shame we have no shining White Knights any more... I will leave it to the vote about allowing the men as members ...pretty sad you would think getting older they would have learnt a few things along the way....only the wrong things.. might have guessed.. i did warn them they would need to be careful of upsetting you.as you are such a stickler for well behaved members...we may have to take out AVOs or whatever it is that keeps them away...I will look into it just in case they dont go quietly...

that wont of course include Santa will it?...the girls will be very upset if they dont get their slap and tickle with Santa...

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Jovial Monk Gold Member Offline Dogs not cats! Posts: 50003 Gender:	Re: C.W.A. Reply #403 - Sep 9^th, 2015 at 1:45pm Unruly members are a dreadful thing, eh?
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cods

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Re: C.W.A.
Reply #404 - Sep 9^th, 2015 at 5:49pm

Jovial Monk wrote on Sep 9^th, 2015 at 1:45pm:

Unruly members are a dreadful thing, eh?

Grin

we just think of ourselves as nymphs and shepherd monk.....frolicing through life with not a care in the world.... if only....the girls at the CWA all try to fit in..and enjoy whatever is happening...some days I really do think I am eating yummy cakes and doing the limbo..whats wrong with that??..if we cant have fun in a fantasy where the hell can you?.. I enjoy the lads myself with decorum at all times though. Wink

and I did think you were a match made in heaven... didnt I get that wrong..

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