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I'm going too (Read 3021 times)
Paki gob on a stick
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I'm going too
Jul 1st, 2012 at 1:53am
 
I've decided to join Matty in New Zealand. This will be a marvellous opportunity for the both of us. Not only will we save on our electricity bills, but we'll try some great wines, have adventures, and get to know each other better.

We'll come back before the next election. Matty will be parachuted into a safe Liberal seat, we'll hit up a few soft touch Christian donors, and I'll manage the campaign.

Matty can promise to end abortion and bring back capital punishment - a tough pro-life campaign. Whatever it takes. We're already promising to stop the boats and end the carbon tax, so no one will notice if we don't get everything right. I'd like to get an animal welfare policy in there somewhere. They like that sort of thing up in Darwin - Ryde and Hornsby too. It depend where Matty goes.

Yes, next year will be our year. Who knows? We may not end the carbon tax, but at least our side will be in government.

Matty can see Indonesia from Darwin - we'll have to use that in the campaign, Matty. It means you're tough on terrorists and other boat people.

Thoughts?
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Uncle Meat
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #1 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:06am
 
Paki gob on a stick wrote on Jul 1st, 2012 at 1:53am:
Matty can promise to end abortion and bring back capital punishment


LOL

Grin
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Sir Spot of Borg
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #2 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 6:16am
 
What is your address in australia? Can i live in  your house while you are gone?

SOB
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Paki gob on a stick
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #3 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:20pm
 
Sir Spot of Borg wrote on Jul 1st, 2012 at 6:16am:
What is your address in australia? Can i live in  your house while you are gone?

SOB


I don't have a house, SOB, and Matty lives with his parents. It's an open marriage. Matty always gets what he wants.

In New Zealand, we'll share a cottage overlooking the sea. Matty wants to write - presumably about the carbon tax. Matty has always admired Mr Abbott's brief time at the Bulletin, and wants to build his profile before preselection. He wants to move to non-fiction.

Personally, I'd like to cook and just enjoy our time together. It will be a bit of a break. Our past year of politics has been so busy, not that I'd change it for the world. Building a profile, creating a political brand and running a campaign for preselection is no small task. The staffers have to be give jobs and followed up. The candidate has to be managed - every word he says has to be vetted, even the backroom deals and back scratching. You have to be on top of everything.

So I'm looking forward to a little peace and quiet before next year's election. Matty still needs to heal from the surgery, so it will give us some much needed "me" time. Believe me, as a politician, Matty spends so much time thinking about others - what do they think of his discrete makeup? Do they think his bottom bulges a little too much in slacks? Were they listening when he posted that he'll join the Greens if he doesn't get what he wants?

These concerns need to be managed on a daily basis, so I'm really looking forward to New Zealand, as is Matty. It's his first overseas trip, so we're really excited.

Woof Woof has been to China, and she's been so helpful with advice, even though it's a completely different country to New Zealand. I hope we can get the sort of food Matty likes there. I'm assuming they'll have hamburgers. It's a decent country, not like Asia.

So much to do! I must start packing. Don't worry, Matty and I will continue to post as usual.


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bobbythefap1
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #4 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:21pm
 
Watch out for Earth Quakes
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A day without sunshine is like night.
 
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Paki gob on a stick
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #5 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:30pm
 
Do you mean real earthquakes, or literary ones?
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Sir Spot of Borg
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #6 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:32pm
 
Paki gob on a stick wrote on Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:30pm:
Do you mean real earthquakes, or literary ones?


New Zealand is getting them every day.

How often does matty get them?

SOB

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bobbythefap1
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #7 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:32pm
 
Paki gob on a stick wrote on Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:30pm:
Do you mean real earthquakes, or literary ones?

Hakka induced earthquakes.
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Dsmithy70
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #8 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:46pm
 
Trust you two to pike out Angry
It is obvious that Matty was never laying the political ground work or that YOU Colonel Karnal, never lined up the dancing girls, performance enhancing drugs or the beds in Bangkok.
It was all talk, well I've just spent 7 hours a day training on MW3, honing my physical and mental attitude to the task that I thought I signed up for.
Watch out cause me,life and Honky might just go for a little holiday in NZ
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Sir Spot of Borg
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #9 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:50pm
 
Wouldnt it be absolutely great if all the idiots decided to leave australia because they hate gillard? Wow!

Especially if they take tony with them.

With actual rational ppl left in australia maybe we can find a way to fix this system.

SOB
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adelcrow
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #10 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:56pm
 
Look after Matty..he has been suffering from post traumatic stress from when he was in Afghanistan and spent time as a dancing boy for a group of randy warlords.
New Zealand will do him good as long as a group of randy Maoris from the Mongrel Mob don't get a hold of him.
He is quite a good looking young fella with smooth skin and a milky white complexion which has been his curse for most of his life.
I pray Abbott never conspires to have him banged up in prison because a sexy young fella like him wont last long in there.
Good luck in NZ Matty and Karnal and never let go of your proud Pakistani heritage
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Paki gob on a stick
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #11 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 3:29pm
 
Dsmithy70 wrote on Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:46pm:
Trust you two to pike out Angry
It is obvious that Matty was never laying the political ground work or that YOU Colonel Karnal, never lined up the dancing girls, performance enhancing drugs or the beds in Bangkok.
It was all talk, well I've just spent 7 hours a day training on MW3, honing my physical and mental attitude to the task that I thought I signed up for.
Watch out cause me,life and Honky might just go for a little holiday in NZ


Smithy, Matty is a political pragmatist. You have to be realistic about these things. In politics, this means being patient and taking baby steps.

First, we have to give ending the carbon tax a go. If we don't stop this, it will be all Labor and the Greens' fault. The same goes with stopping the boats.

But you have to admit, at least we will have given it a try.

Invading China is next on our agenda, but there are, of course, political considerations.

Matty is just a humble member of the Liberal Party. He has to obey the will of the caucus and the leader of the party. At present, Matty is behind Mr Abbott 100%. As for myself, I merely carry out Matty's orders.

If there are any threats of violence coming from you and your mob, you will find yourself subject to the full force of New Zealand law - after Matty records a you tube video outlining his last will and testament and goes on Today Tonight.
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #12 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 3:37pm
 
Sir Spot of Borg wrote on Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:50pm:
Wouldnt it be absolutely great if all the idiots decided to leave australia because they hate gillard? Wow!

Especially if they take tony with them.

With actual rational ppl left in australia maybe we can find a way to fix this system.

SOB




We can but dream....... Tongue
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...
 
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adelcrow
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #13 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 3:52pm
 
Kat wrote on Jul 1st, 2012 at 3:37pm:
Sir Spot of Borg wrote on Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:50pm:
Wouldnt it be absolutely great if all the idiots decided to leave australia because they hate gillard? Wow!

Especially if they take tony with them.

With actual rational ppl left in australia maybe we can find a way to fix this system.

SOB




We can but dream....... Tongue


I hope Mattty realises that the conservative NZ govt supports a price on carbon.
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Go the Bunnies
 
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john_g
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Re: I'm going too
Reply #14 - Jul 1st, 2012 at 3:53pm
 
Kat wrote on Jul 1st, 2012 at 3:37pm:
Sir Spot of Borg wrote on Jul 1st, 2012 at 2:50pm:
Wouldnt it be absolutely great if all the idiots decided to leave australia because they hate gillard? Wow!

Especially if they take tony with them.

With actual rational ppl left in australia maybe we can find a way to fix this system.

SOB




We can but dream....... Tongue


Are Gillard, Milne and Co included?
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