Ok, Buddy, don't take this the wrong way. I'm trying to help you with some constructive criticism and questions that might help you to actually flesh out whatever it is you new party is for or against.
Peace Life Party wrote on Jun 26
th, 2012 at 12:49pm:
Introduction
This is unnecessary. We already know it's the introduction since this is the beginning of your post. One of the keys to winning the hearts and minds (and wallets) or potential ideological converts is to keep your schpeel short and to the point. So trimming the fat by removing redundant things like this would help you out a lot.
Quote:This is 21st Century.
This is terrible English. Seriously, that needs to read "this is the 21st Century". Another key to converting the masses to your wacky ideology is being able to clearly communicate. It's pretty hard to tell people about your new party if we can't understand you.
Quote:We wereare not happy (actually we are angry), of what is happening in the world.
I'm going to assume that you are still unhappy, so it should be "are not happy". "Were" would make it past tense, indicating that you are no longer unhappy with whatever is happening in the world. Also added "we are" to the bit in parenthesis and a comma after the closing parenthesis.
This is stuff MS Word could have caught, guy.
Quote:We wereare not happy that in the name of Capitalism the Governments of the world work for the rich and neglect rest of the population at the peril of the Countries they were elected to serve.
Seriously, what is it with you and the past tense? Next time read what you wrote out loud and if it doesn't sound right then it probably isn't.
Quote:Especially in Australia where 100% goes to vote as voting is mandatory.
What exactly is it about mandatory voting that bothers you? Is it that you have to go and vote or that you feel as if your vote is being wasted?
Quote:More so when shares of the companies and Currency Rate of a Country are manipulated not by the conditions in the Country, but by the Hedge Funds in the world making many mammas and papas investors to ruinruining the livelihoods of average citizens through poor investments.
1. Welcome to the global economy.
2. I'm guessing English isn't your first language.
Quote:Worse in the Namename of the open market these same Governments, to help thisthe rich to trade overseas, have let the overseas rich to scavenge everything Australian without any benefit to the people. They gobble every natural resource,and prime pastoral lands. These policies in the long run will beare going to ruin the Country.
Ok, besides the terrible abuse of my language...
Overseas trade is a vital component of Australia's economy (or any First/Developing World economy for that matter). So unless you're planning on using a platform of isolationism and pretty much screwing your country's economy like it was a cheap Mexican hooker I'm kind of wondering if you've actually though this through at all.
In short, do you have a plan for solving whatever problems you seem to find in the current system without doing massive and possibly irreparable harm to your country?
Quote:Worse, with all the wealth they gained from Australian dirt, they BLACMAILEDblackmailed the Australian Government of the people when the Government proposed to Tax them.
Who did this blackmailing you speak of? Give specific examples, preferably well known ones. This way the people you're trying to convince will have some idea about what you're saying.
Ok, instead of going line-by-line correcting your terrible grasp of my language I'm going to pretend you get the point by now and skip ahead to specific claims you've made.
Quote:Imagine you and I the voters, blackmailing the Australian Government.
You already do that every time it's an election year. When you break it down to simplest cases, voting for your political leadership is really just a means of blackmailing them with the threat that if the politicians don't do what you want then you won't vote for them again.
See, stuff like this is why I respect organized crime. The church will tell you "give us money or you ain't going to heaven". THe government says "give us money or you'll life in lawlessness and anarchy". Gangsters are at least honest enough to just come right out and tell you that if you don't give them money they'll have Sal and Little Tony break your legs.
Quote:All the resources of the Country belong to the people. In Australia they belong to Aborigine first and to the rest of Citizens.
Are these "people" going to provide the capital needed to mine/exploit those natural resources in order to bring them to market?
Quote:Our health system makes sure there is always large waiting list for minor surgeries so that many are forced to take private health insurance and get Immediate health benefits.
Oh, stop whining. At least your country has socialized medicine. Trust me, waiting in line is a lot better than not receiving any care at all.
Quote:Economic theories that were wonderful in 19th and 20th Centuries seem to have created a mess.
Which theories in specific are you talking about here? What economic theory do you propose to try instead?
Quote:PREAMBLE
Preambles go at the beginning of a document or speech, high speed.
Quote:Abraham Lincoln said: The Government is Of the People By the People and For the People.
Lincoln never said any such thing. I take it you're trying to quote the Gettysburg Address, right? Let's see what the actual quote was and see just how hilariously out of context you are.
"It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us—that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion—that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain—that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom—and that government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth."
He wasn't talking about some strange new form of socialism, he was speaking about the cost of war and the cost of "freedom".
Seriously, if you're going to quote or even paraphrase famous political figures then you really need to get it right. Otherwise don't bother because it'll just make people point at you and laugh.