Australian Politics Forum - I have a relationship problem

Lisa Jones Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 39047 Sydney Gender:	Re: I have a relationship problem Reply #30 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:53pm Aussie wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 3:02pm: muso wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 12:11pm: Off-Topic replies have been moved to this Topic. Where? That link takes me to place I am not allowed to see. Which is most unfortunate .. given it has effectively masked/hidden the trolling and abuse posted by Mantra.
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Mod. Moderator Offline OzPolitic Posts: 1200 Gender:	Re: I have a relationship problem Reply #31 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:55pm .....and/or on the other hand, Amadd...........this Forum is hardly the place to seek advice worthy of listening to. If you are fair dinkum, go and see a professional.
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Lisa Jones Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 39047 Sydney Gender:	Re: I have a relationship problem Reply #32 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:56pm Mod. wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:55pm: .....and/or on the other hand, Amadd...........this Forum is hardly the place to seek advice worthy of listening to. If you are fair dinkum, go and see a professional. THANK YOU! THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO SAY!!!!
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Sappho

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Re: I have a relationship problem
Reply #33 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:59pm

Sappho wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 4:22pm:

Amadd wrote on Apr 22^nd, 2011 at 6:49am:

I need to admit to it.

My parents seperated/ divorced when I was 12 yrs of age and I never really got over that.

I was on the cusp of puberty and I had bigger things on my mind than my parents deserting my forwarding needs.
As so happened, I come across a very sticky situation at 12 yrs of age where I had to identify a shooter who put another guy in a wheelchair for life.

My mother was totally ignorant of my situation 'cause she was way too busy smacking that other dude who split our family.

After all of of the court cases..all the way to the supreme court, the shooter got off 'cause of lack of evidence.
I was left to watch him watching me almost every other day.

I kept a rifle on my lap for at least two years, I listened intently for every sound..I rarely slept properly. My faith was in my faithful dog.

Since then, I have travelled the world and enjoyed myself ..it's nice to not have a worry.

Upon getting back from my travels, I developed a nice relationship with my grandmother who also enjoyed travelling and sharing experiences.
Then my mother buts in and insists on cleaning my floor and doing stuff that is a bit personally insulting.

She wasn't around when I was holding a gun on my lap...she was no use to me then.

I don't really want her around so much...she should get over it. It's not my prob.

I sense resentment from you and guilt from her... both of which are perfectly understandable and normal given the circumstances.

You seem to have a good relationship with your Grandmother... if she is a reasonable woman with empathy... talk to her about your struggles to come to terms with your mother's mistakes.

Whilst others behave like children, caring more about themselves than you... I have taken your concerns seriously and am happy to discuss the further, with respect and empathy, if you want.

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"Love is a cunning weaver of fantasies and fables."

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Lisa Jones

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Re: I have a relationship problem
Reply #34 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:04pm

Lisa Jones wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:56pm:

Mod. wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:55pm:

.....and/or on the other hand, Amadd...........this Forum is hardly the place to seek advice worthy of listening to. If you are fair dinkum, go and see a professional.

THANK YOU! THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO SAY!!!!

In fact .. Muso our Global Mod also stated the same thing (more or less)!

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If I let myself be bought then I am no longer free.

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mantra

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Re: I have a relationship problem
Reply #35 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:05pm

Mod. wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:55pm:

.....and/or on the other hand, Amadd...........this Forum is hardly the place to seek advice worthy of listening to. If you are fair dinkum, go and see a professional.

Maybe he prefers to chat about it anonymously and informally. Don't you think it's rather rude telling him to see a shrink Aussie?

Those who have responded are happy to share - regardless of whether we're "qualified". We have a multitude of life experiences to offer and maybe some of us have been where Amadd is at some stage of our life.

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Lisa Jones

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Re: I have a relationship problem
Reply #36 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:07pm

Lisa Jones wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:04pm:

Lisa Jones wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:56pm:

Mod. wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:55pm:

.....and/or on the other hand, Amadd...........this Forum is hardly the place to seek advice worthy of listening to. If you are fair dinkum, go and see a professional.

THANK YOU! THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO SAY!!!!

In fact .. Muso our Global Mod also stated the same thing (more or less)!

When 2 Mods (a Global and a forum Mod) are saying the same thing .. then perhaps one ought to listen to what is being posted by these people?

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If I let myself be bought then I am no longer free.

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Mod.

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Re: I have a relationship problem
Reply #37 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:08pm

Lisa Jones wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:04pm:

Lisa Jones wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:56pm:

Mod. wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:55pm:

.....and/or on the other hand, Amadd...........this Forum is hardly the place to seek advice worthy of listening to. If you are fair dinkum, go and see a professional.

THANK YOU! THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO SAY!!!!

In fact .. Muso our Global Mod also stated the same thing!

All good, then Lisa. Now, let's allow Amadd to make his choice. It is really up to him if he wants to be advised by amateurs.

So, I reckon I have said all I can in my little corner of this World tonight. Let's hope peace breaks out overnight, wot?

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mantra Gold Member Offline ozpolitic.com Posts: 10750 Gender:	Re: I have a relationship problem Reply #38 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:09pm Quote: When 2 Mods (a Global and a forum Mod) are saying the same thing .. then perhaps one ought to listen to what is being posted by these people? Can you point out where Muso stated such a thing? And Aussie is probably on his second VB tonight, so disregard his comments.
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Aussie

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Re: I have a relationship problem
Reply #39 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:13pm

mantra wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:09pm:

Quote:

When 2 Mods (a Global and a forum Mod) are saying the same thing .. then perhaps one ought to listen to what is being posted by these people?

Can you point out where Muso stated such a thing? And Aussie is probably on his second VB tonight, so disregard his comments.

Nah, mantra.....'tis Tuesday night. An alcohol free evening.

Cool

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Lisa Jones

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Re: I have a relationship problem
Reply #40 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:16pm

Mod. wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:08pm:

Lisa Jones wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:04pm:

Lisa Jones wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:56pm:

Mod. wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:55pm:

.....and/or on the other hand, Amadd...........this Forum is hardly the place to seek advice worthy of listening to. If you are fair dinkum, go and see a professional.

THANK YOU! THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO SAY!!!!

In fact .. Muso our Global Mod also stated the same thing!

All good, then Lisa. Now, let's allow Amadd to make his choice. It is really up to him if he wants to be advised by amateurs.

So, I reckon I have said all I can in my little corner of this World tonight. Let's hope peace breaks out overnight, wot?

Well said Mod .. and many thanks for putting it all in perspective

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If I let myself be bought then I am no longer free.

HYPATIA - Greek philosopher, mathematician and astronomer (370 - 415)

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Sappho

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Re: I have a relationship problem
Reply #41 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:20pm

Sappho wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 6:59pm:

Sappho wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 4:22pm:

Amadd wrote on Apr 22^nd, 2011 at 6:49am:

I need to admit to it.

My parents seperated/ divorced when I was 12 yrs of age and I never really got over that.

I was on the cusp of puberty and I had bigger things on my mind than my parents deserting my forwarding needs.
As so happened, I come across a very sticky situation at 12 yrs of age where I had to identify a shooter who put another guy in a wheelchair for life.

My mother was totally ignorant of my situation 'cause she was way too busy smacking that other dude who split our family.

After all of of the court cases..all the way to the supreme court, the shooter got off 'cause of lack of evidence.
I was left to watch him watching me almost every other day.

I kept a rifle on my lap for at least two years, I listened intently for every sound..I rarely slept properly. My faith was in my faithful dog.

Since then, I have travelled the world and enjoyed myself ..it's nice to not have a worry.

Upon getting back from my travels, I developed a nice relationship with my grandmother who also enjoyed travelling and sharing experiences.
Then my mother buts in and insists on cleaning my floor and doing stuff that is a bit personally insulting.

She wasn't around when I was holding a gun on my lap...she was no use to me then.

I don't really want her around so much...she should get over it. It's not my prob.

I sense resentment from you and guilt from her... both of which are perfectly understandable and normal given the circumstances.

You seem to have a good relationship with your Grandmother... if she is a reasonable woman with empathy... talk to her about your struggles to come to terms with your mother's mistakes.

Whilst others behave like children, caring more about themselves than you... I have taken your concerns seriously and am happy to discuss the further, with respect and empathy, if you want.

Unlike the mod and others who seem to think issue is worthy of a Psychiatrist... I think that what you are experiencing is very common in young adults and could be perfectly well discussed here so long as others are respectful.

A lot of the angst that teens and 20 something adults feel towards their parent/s stems from their childhood idealization of believing their parents perfect... then discovering they are as flawed as any other person.

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Lisa Jones Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 39047 Sydney Gender:	Re: I have a relationship problem Reply #42 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:22pm Amadd .. read the above post carefully .. then read what the Mods and I have been advising you. You will notice a few interesting things/anomalies.
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Aussie

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Re: I have a relationship problem
Reply #43 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 8:31pm

Quote:

Unlike the mod and others who seem to think issue is worthy of a Psychiatrist...

That is not what "Mod." said Sappho. No mention of psychiatrist at all.

There would be quite a range of Professionals who assistance Amadd could seek out, from Hairdressers, Taxi Drivers, Social Workers, local GPs, local Priests, local Swamis, local Witch Doctors, psychologists et al.

Cheesy

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Lisa Jones Gold Member Offline Australian Politics Posts: 39047 Sydney Gender:	Re: I have a relationship problem Reply #44 - Apr 26^th, 2011 at 8:47pm Lisa Jones wrote on Apr 26^th, 2011 at 7:22pm: Amadd .. read the above post carefully .. then read what the Mods and I have been advising you. You will notice a few interesting things/anomalies. Umm ONE of the anomalies has just been pointed out by Aussie.
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