They may say I do but what to do when the state says, no you don't?
Jason Koutsoukis, Jerusalem
August 11, 2009
FOR many Israeli Jews such as Olga Samosvatov and Nico Tarosyan, getting married is not as easy as it sounds.
To officially tie the knot, both parties must satisfy the country's Orthodox rabbinate that they are Jewish, according to traditional Jewish law.
That means proof of a Jewish mother, or documentary evidence of an Orthodox conversion to Judaism.
Because the rabbinate has a monopoly over Jewish marriages - there is no such thing as a civil marriage in Israel - anyone not recognised as Jewish must travel abroad to get a marriage licence.
Which is not so much of a problem for Ms Samosvatov, 29, who migrated to Israel from Ukraine in 1995 with her Jewish mother.
But for the man she wants to marry, proving his Jewish identity has been impossible.
''My parents did not tell me I was Jewish until I was 12 when neighbours kept painting anti-Semitic graffiti on the door of our home,'' says Mr Tarosyan, 34, who migrated to Israel from Russia in the same year as his wife-to-be.
''At one time, I was scared to go out on to the street because they were beating up Jews. I immigrated to Israel as soon as I finished college and I feel very much at home here and very safe. But this need to prove I am Jewish to the rabbis is humiliating.''
Although Mr Tarosyan's parents were Jewish, and he is an Israeli citizen who served in the Israeli army, because he has no written proof that his mother was Jewish he cannot be legally married in Israel. For their marriage to be officially recognised, the couple must obtain a civil marriage licence abroad that they can then register with Israel's Interior Ministry.
''We plan on flying to Prague in the fall,'' says Mr Tarosyan. One of more than 300,000 Israeli Jews who cannot prove their Jewish identity - most of them Russian migrants - Mr Tarosyan says he and Ms Samosvatov chose to raise awareness of their predicament by taking part in a public Jewish wedding service in Tel Aviv's Dizengoff Square last week.
The service performed by the marriage advocacy group Havaya, which conducts hundreds of private wedding services each year for Israelis not recognised as Jews by the state, was just like any other traditional Jewish wedding.
''It was important for us to get married here in Israel under the chuppah in a meaningful Jewish ceremony together with our family and friends,'' says Ms Samosvatov.
''I hope (the wedding) will serve to change the law in Israel so that people can have whatever type of Jewish wedding they want.''
According to Diti Peleg-Dagani, director of Havaya, couples such as Ms Samosvatov and Mr Tarosyan are committed Israeli citizens who are proud of their country and identify themselves as Jews.
''Yet they suffer this form of discrimination … Unless we change the law, then couples like this will have no choice but to leave Israel,'' says Ms Peleg. She estimates that thousands of couples who cannot get official recognition as Jews or who reject the Orthodox rabbinate's monopoly on marriage travel overseas for their wedding ceremonies.
Itzik Shanan, a director of the New Israel Fund, a philanthropic organisation that provides financial support to organisations such as Havaya, says the law must reflect freedom of choice in marriage.
''I was born in Israel, I speak Hebrew, I went to a Jewish school, I served in the army, and both my parents are Jewish,'' he says. ''When it came time to marry, I went abroad because I did not want to give this power to the rabbinate.
''Change doesn't seem likely under this Government, but as long as public pressure grows, more and more political bodies will understand that unless the laws are reformed, religious dogma will divide Jews irrevocably.''
Source:
The Age
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