PZ547
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A friend of my niece was compelled to stay at her father's place on a set number of weekends. Her parents were divorced. The father lived on an island close to Sydney city, which I mention simply as an explanation as to why the girl couldn't just leap on a bus home
Was told but can't remember the girl's age, but think it was between age 11 and 12
Her father sexually abused her to the extent of rape. The girl confided in my niece who in turn told her own parents who didn't know what, if anything, they should try to do. That the abused child would be forced to recount her experience to several within child protection services and court was obvious. The mother would need to be informed. And the father would most likely deny it. End result would be further trauma for the child. My in-laws did not want to become embroiled. I would have done. They chose not to -- their choice and a pretty common one, no doubt. They moved interstate not long afterwards. I have no idea what happened to that child as I wasn't told about it until much later
Female neighbour of several years was a nut-case, an alcoholic and very poor parent. People condemned her, others tried to help her (lost cause) and others attempted to get her husband involved (not interested, long distance truckie)
At the heart of the neighbour's problems was her incestuous father who had also, if she's to be believed (and her emotional rendition of the event was disturbing and persuasive) murdered her mother in the stockyards of a country town
That the neighbour needed help was obvious to even a casual observer, based on her behaviours. She self medicated using alcohol. She had an unhealthy and obvious, fascination with sex, all sorts of sex including bestiality. She'd transferred this to her daughter at least who had a precocious interest in sex when even five and six. She became the local bike in her very early teens and an unwed mother by fifteen, after which she went on to have more illegitimate children
The neighbour's allegedly incestuous father invited himself to stay in her home. She was repulsed by him but said she couldn't very well tell her father he was not welcome
A family I knew well was in chaos after one of the grandchildren, girl aged six, told her mother that her father's father (paternal grandfather) had been molesting her
It resulted in a family meeting. The grandfather had four children who each had several children, so up to a dozen children at risk
At first, the parents of the children were outraged with their father. Outrage is good, but what were the repercussions for the entire family? Two of the parents held government positions in Victorian country towns. What would it cost them if the matter were reported to authorities? Loss of job/career, loss of face and reputation, ongoing gossip within the community and surrounds, possible media reports, all the kids ostracised at school and elsewhere, on ongoing basis
Sympathy for the child, and outrage, swiftly subsided. A solution was devised. The grandmother and grandfather would retire & move, which they did, to coastal Queensland, far away. Before taking up residence in their new town, the grandmother and grandfather went overseas for a few months
Two of their children, who were parents to grandchildren, moved up near their parents soon afterwards. The father of the allegedly abused child left his wife and family and also moved up close to his parents' new home
The mother of the allegedly abused child was a weak, timid woman. She soon remarried, providing her four children with a stepfather. Few years later, her second marriage having been dissolved, she and three of her children ALSO moved to Queensland, as had her first husband and his parents, etc.
The allegedly abused child was effectively disowned. Was ostracised by the entire extended family and described as a liar. In a few years, that entire extended family were reunited in Queensland, leaving the abused girl behind in Victoria. I do not know what became of her
The grandmother knew full well, as did her adult children, that her husband, the grandfather, was a dominant, conceited alcoholic. The grandmother confided to me that he beat her up in her old age because he could not maintain an erection. I once had a heated argument with him about censorship. He exulted in society's increasing acceptance of various sexual perversions and permissiveness. He was treated as if he were the ideal tv grandfather. When he finally died, his children and grandchildren continued the deceit in glowing tributes to him. His wife was hospitalised with a series of strokes prior to his death. Clearly she had told her sons about her husband's physical abuse and preoccupation with sex into his 80s, because they apparently warned their father. All too late
So, merely three tales of destruction wrought by child sex abuse which becomes a generational issue according to researchers
Sex abuse makes poor parents of the victim. How can a parent who was sexually abused as a child raise their own children with healthy attitudes to relationships, boundaries and sexuality?
Sexual abuse claims more than the original victims
The escalating addiction to child-porn contributes to an already disturbing societal problem. Child-porn is lucrative. The children who are featured in child-porn are increasingly cited as being the pornographer's own children/stepchildren
Who has a solution?
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