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RU OK? (Read 18399 times)
Gordon
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Gordon
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RU OK?
Sep 8th, 2016 at 9:56am
 
I'm super, thanks for asking.
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IBI
 
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cods
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #1 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 10:12am
 
I have been asked that a lot....its nice but don t ask it if you havent the time to listen to their answer.
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aquascoot
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #2 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 12:03pm
 
another rediculous policy designed to make people "identify" with their "inner pain".

F*ck your inner pain.

Dont people just get bored of always focusing on themselves?

My pain, my problems, my life , me, me, me,

Develop a love for "contribution" and a love of the journey.
learn to make love to your problems.

Dont listen to your mind. Your mind will tell you to wallow in self pity as your mind doesnt care at all about your dreams and aspirations.

develop your "willpower".

A level above your mind to control your mind.

See yourself as in a battle with your mind and youre just going to win.

Set yourself a bunch of things that you will do and then man up and do them.

the gym...every day
good food...every day
inspirational books...every day
contribute value to everyone you interact with...every day.

every time you do it, you improve .000001 %.

depression is in some ways a psychological addiction to laziness. allow in this addiction if you like, but there is no future in it.

like addictions to drugs, gambling, sugar, porn, validation, approval, money...it will not ever make you content.

You must learn to


1 engage and fully accept EVERYTHING that happens to you as happening to help you grow.

2  have ZERO dependance on an outcome.
you cannot ever be disappointed if you do something just for the joy of doing it , with no hint of "needing" things to go your way.

depression is rampant in todays society because people are mentally lazy and have not developed a strong pre frontal cortex.  EVERY PROBLEM is an opportunity to develop your willpower.  love your problems  Wink Wink
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Unforgiven
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #3 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 12:19pm
 
Gordon wrote on Sep 8th, 2016 at 9:56am:
I'm super, thanks for asking.


Please seek a second opinion.

Aquascoot's demented blatherings are colored by its infusion of its own anal emanations blended with horse farts.
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“I’ll let you be in my dreams if I can be in yours” Bob Dylan
 
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Agnes
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #4 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 1:13pm
 
no  point complaining
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x=^..^= x <o((((>< ~~~ x=^..^=x~~~x=^..^=x<o((((><~~~x=^..^=x


farewell to days of wild abandon and freedom in the adriatic
 
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greggerypeccary
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #5 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 1:44pm
 
Unforgiven wrote on Sep 8th, 2016 at 12:19pm:
Gordon wrote on Sep 8th, 2016 at 9:56am:
I'm super, thanks for asking.


Please seek a second opinion.



Grin
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Neferti
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #6 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 2:00pm
 
There are many, many people out there with mental health issues. This is what this is all about.

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2016-09-08/r-u-ok-day-brings-colour-to-bondi/7824768
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PZ547
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #7 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 2:28pm
 
aquascoot wrote on Sep 8th, 2016 at 12:03pm:
another rediculous policy designed to make people "identify" with their "inner pain".

F*ck your inner pain.

Dont people just get bored of always focusing on themselves?

My pain, my problems, my life , me, me, me,

Develop a love for "contribution" and a love of the journey.
learn to make love to your problems.

Dont listen to your mind. Your mind will tell you to wallow in self pity as your mind doesnt care at all about your dreams and aspirations.

develop your "willpower".

A level above your mind to control your mind.

See yourself as in a battle with your mind and youre just going to win.

Set yourself a bunch of things that you will do and then man up and do them.

the gym...every day
good food...every day
inspirational books...every day
contribute value to everyone you interact with...every day.

every time you do it, you improve .000001 %.

depression is in some ways a psychological addiction to laziness. allow in this addiction if you like, but there is no future in it.

like addictions to drugs, gambling, sugar, porn, validation, approval, money...it will not ever make you content.

You must learn to


1 engage and fully accept EVERYTHING that happens to you as happening to help you grow.

2  have ZERO dependance on an outcome.
you cannot ever be disappointed if you do something just for the joy of doing it , with no hint of "needing" things to go your way.

depression is rampant in todays society because people are mentally lazy and have not developed a strong pre frontal cortex.  EVERY PROBLEM is an opportunity to develop your willpower.  love your problems  Wink Wink


-----------

Above is excellent advice   Smiley

For younger people though, it might be kicked angrily aside

because younger people have been assured, particularly while at school, that all they need do is 'dream hard enough', basically, and success will surely be theirs

In other words, at school and in much of the media they consume (tv, movies, etc) younger people are subject to the insinuation that if they fail, it's their fault -- for not dreaming and trying hard enough.  They're told they can 'be anything' if they put their mind to it

All around, people see others enjoying materialism: nice vehicles, nice clothing, good jobs & careers, apartments & homes, holidays abroad, active social life, etc

Now, imagine being in your early 20s and living in Junee or Wagga or Bathurst.  They've done everything asked of them and have emerged from their education with good grades and the expectation of finding well-paid employment which in turn they expect will provide them with all the things they desire

Until that point it's been an upward progression: primary, secondary, tertiary education.  They've been programmed to seeing their lives as consisting of one upward step after another.  Then the momentum stops dead.  No work on offer.  Hard-dreamed-of ambitions turning to seed before their eyes

Nothing has prepared them for it. They become acutely conscious of every forward-tick of the clock. On Facebook, people they knew moved to the city, have a great apartment & social life and are bragging about their latest trip to X, their promotion, etc.

Poor kid back in Junee feels a failure. He sees the world moving forward -- without him.  He applies for more positions and regards every rejection as further testimony of his personal failure

He decides Life doesn't want him.  School has finished with him - the happy optimism he knew there as he sweated over one assignment after another, is gone. His school's filled with new faces, new hopes.  He's already redundant

No job. No money. Friends scattered far. Facebook pages taunt him. Every moment, his dreams slap him in the face. Can't get a girlfriend because no job, no money, no car, nothing to offer

He stays at home, loathing himself, assuring his family he's applying for anything going

In private, his sense of loss is worsened with every moment. Long, empty afternoons are torture -- no mail, no job offer, another day gone.  Dad clinging to a job by the skin of his teeth. Mum making meals out of nothing. Talk about having to sell, to move -- but where. Their worried expressions when he enters the room: 'Have you tried at Coles?'.  Then, ' You need to get out of your room. Get out and talk to people, you never know .. they might know someone who knows someone.  Otherwise, you're going to have to see if you can stay with Aunt Ruth up in Campbelltown -- that's where the work is, in the city.  You can't just mope around here '

Except he'd been dreaming-hard since he was ten of being a marine biologist. The teachers had said it was a good career choice and he was good at science.  He'd done everything right, passed all the exams.  He'd seen himself as a marine biologist for so long that it was part of him.  He'd seen the beautiful girlfriend, the nice apartment, the prestige as he climbed the ranks, the early retirement, golf, travel, living life with confidence and meaning

Now, all he feels is loss so profound it exhausts him. Another birthday passes, then another

One day he goes into the bush with a length of rope so he can remove his loathed self from a world which obviously has no place for him.  Then multiply him by tens of thousands

They need work, folding money and reasons to live. Telling them to buck-up doesn't give them any of those at their age and stage, unfortunately
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Bobby.
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #8 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 2:45pm
 
When you learn that 90% of your problems are caused by other people
it's easy to see that you can do very little about them.

That should make you feel powerless but better.
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PZ547
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #9 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 3:30pm
 
Bobby. wrote on Sep 8th, 2016 at 2:45pm:
When you learn that 90% of your problems are caused by other people
it's easy to see that you can do very little about them.

That should make you feel powerless but better.



Shoulda, woulda, coulda, Bobby

Expectations motivate humans to take their next breath

Maybe it's the simple expectation of being able to take the next breath, for someone in palliative care or with the priest by their side.  Nevertheless, the expectation of being able to take another breath can keep someone going

Another simple expectation might be the backpacker lost in the Aussie bush, his water-bottle empty and nothing to see other than the blazing sun in the sky and the odd cloud.  If the backpacker expects people to be searching for him, if he expects a helicopter or water-hole or bore to appear 'any moment now', he might push himself to put one foot after another whereas without expectation or hope, he might just as easily lie down beneath a shrub and give up the ghost

The expectation that the next interview might result in paid employment keeps tens of thousands going, gets them up in the morning, leads them to the bathroom to brush-up and onto public transport, resume in hand

The expectation that one or other of the parents will have a job by the time the new baby is born might stop the woman from jumping off the dining table in the hope of causing a miscarriage

The expectation that this next blind-date might result in a real relationship is what keeps people forking out money to dating-agencies and turning up at the designated venue

The expectation that life will be a bit better tomorrow is what keeps people struggling on

People in dire straights who can find no reason to go on living don't need philosophies.  They need a tangible reason to keep going

People who've been balancing on the top rung of the Golden Gate Bridge, spilt seconds from death, have been pulled back by random strangers, after which many of them have gone on to make some sort of meaningful life for themselves.  Others have had a second/successful try for death.  But it wasn't philosophy or advice that saved them in their ultimate moment of despair.  It was human contact, an extension of a stranger's concern for them -- just one person out of billions who cared enough to wrench them back.  Sometimes that's all it takes -- human warmth and empathy -- a stranger's hand and a voice that says, 'Come here. I've got you.  Hold on.  You're safe. It's ok. It's going to be ok'


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Neferti
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #10 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 3:35pm
 
Bobby. wrote on Sep 8th, 2016 at 2:45pm:
When you learn that 90% of your problems are caused by other people
it's easy to see that you can do very little about them.

That should make you feel powerless but better.


Are the "them" of which you speak,  YOUR problems or the OTHER PEOPLE who caused the problems?  Grin


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Re: RU OK?
Reply #11 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 3:45pm
 


Some people are more resilient that others and definitely some generations are vastly less resilient than their predecessors.


Some people can face unimaginable hardship and pain with great courage and some fall apart at the slightest challenge.


I have been reading on the news about osher gunsberg (ex VJ) that dude is as soft as fkk, Im surprised he hasn't topped himself. Some pap took a photo of him and he carries on like someone shot his dog.

Some people are not ok.

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Re: RU OK?
Reply #12 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 3:52pm
 
There are a LOT of people with mental health issues out there ....

Maybe we have encouraged the "It's Not Fair on Me" brigade?

Some people go through an awful lot of problems and never "top themselves" and would never even think about doing so. Others just can't cope and do the unthinkable because of the "It's not fair on me" thing.  WHY? Something isn't working out there. Young people suicide is through the roof, apparently.
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greggerypeccary
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #13 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 4:21pm
 
BigOl64 wrote on Sep 8th, 2016 at 3:45pm:
Some people are more resilient that others and definitely some generations are vastly less resilient than their predecessors.


Some people can face unimaginable hardship and pain with great courage and some fall apart at the slightest challenge.


I have been reading on the news about osher gunsberg (ex VJ) that dude is as soft as fkk, Im surprised he hasn't topped himself. Some pap took a photo of him and he carries on like someone shot his dog.

Some people are not ok.



Didn't he used to be Andy G?

Bloody poms!

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PZ547
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Re: RU OK?
Reply #14 - Sep 8th, 2016 at 4:21pm
 
Neferti wrote on Sep 8th, 2016 at 3:52pm:
There are a LOT of people with mental health issues out there ....

Maybe we have encouraged the "It's Not Fair on Me" brigade?

Some people go through an awful lot of problems and never "top themselves" and would never even think about doing so. Others just can't cope and do the unthinkable because of the "It's not fair on me" thing.  WHY? Something isn't working out there. Young people suicide is through the roof, apparently.



Some people are more resilient, that's a fact. If we knew why, we'd bottle it

Maybe a tendency to depression (of whatever variety) is inherited.  Many scientists/doctors believe so.  Others disagree

Pharmaceuticals can often exacerbate depression. Online research will leave most in no doubt of that.  The only question remaining, actually, is 'Is it intentional' that people should be made worse by 'pills' which promise to 'make everything better'

Some people might be fortunate in having mentally resilient forebears.  Additionally, they might have supportive family and friends.  Others may be less fortunate to varying degrees

There's what's called 'situational depression' which can hit a person who's lost their job or spouse or friends, etc.  Prior to their crisis, they might have been generally stable.  Sometimes they recover without assistance or further misfortune

Then there's 'endogenous depression'.  Here's a link to the basics: http://www.depression-test.net/endogenous-depression.html

To my understanding, endogenous depression is more an inherited form. It may lie dormant through a person's early years, although not always.  It's a person's basic tendency toward depression

Some people may 'have' endogenous depression which doesn't emerge full-blown until triggered further by 'situational depression', whereby a person with genetic tendency toward severe depression in any case encounters what to them is a major life-blow such as loss of career, loss of a child or a spouse, loss of face in the community, etc.

So depression is not a 'one size fits all' situation

Nor is there a 'one size fits all' solution

Many people we pass in the street, or they may be our neighbours or even a member of our own family -- may be struggling like heroes with depression on their own.  This is recognized by those struggling to save such persons, hence the 'R U Ok' messages

'Oh, he fell under a train -- accident. We think someone might have pushed him.  Or he slipped.  There was nothing wrong. We would have known if there was.  He was perfectly normal. We would have seen signs if anything was wrong.  He would have told us'

'He died in a car crash. Not his fault. Just driving down the street. What a waste of life. He had everything to live for -- new baby, nice home.  Bloody shame'

Police and investigators, witnesses, etc. tell a different story

Those who've lost someone to depression and suicide suffer immense guilt, even those who've tried repeatedly to reach out and help

Deeply depressed individuals suffer.  They really suffer.  They don't see the same world as other people. They see it differently.  They're in pain. They try to 'fix' themselves, but it's as if they're enveloped in never-ending grey and pain, no escape, no relief.  They go inside themselves. When the pain's too much, they want to escape it, which is reasonable.  When we're in pain, we take an asprin. For the depressed individual, death is a big asprin and who could blame them for seeking an end

If you haven't been there, you're lucky

If you have, you understand it all too well

Telling a depressed person to 'buck up' is the equivalent of telling a man without legs to get off his arse or telling someone on their deathbed to stop whinging and get on with it because 'everyone has problems'
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