It’s been the buzzword of the last few years that doesn’t appear to be losing speed: mindfulness.

We’ve been told being mindful - that is, focusing solely on the present and our current situations - will heal our unhealthy relationships with food, our mental health and other people.

We must always be mindful if we want to achieve true happiness, or so some people would have us believe.

But achieving mindfulness isn’t easy, and if a new study is to be believed, men should just give up trying.

New research by Brown University in the US suggests that women get much more from mindfulness than men.

The researchers assessed a group of 41 male and 36 female students over a period of 12 weeks, during which time they all underwent a course in mindfulness.

They found that whilst the women experienced a significant change in mental state, the changes for men were minimal.

The reason for the difference is unclear, but the researchers have suggested that it could be because women have a higher tendency to spend time reflecting on things than men.

In contrast, men tend to cast aside and ignore their concerns and worries. But because they do this, they are more likely to be focusing on the present moment already so have less to gain from practising mindfulness.

“That was the surprising part,” said Dr Willoughby Britton, assistant professor of psychiatry and human behavior and of behavioral and social sciences at Brown.

“I wouldn't be surprised if this is a widespread phenomenon that researchers hadn't bothered to investigate,” she added.

Co-lead author Rahil Rojiani said he hopes the study will even out disparities in mental health care.

“The gender gap in mental health has been inadequately targeted and often only within the standard medical arsenal of pharmacological treatment,” Rojiani said. “Our study is one of the first to explore the effects of mindfulness across gender.”

The findings come despite previous research claiming mindfulness can have many benefits, as well as claims from many men that being mindful has helped them manage health problems and lead happier lives.

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/mindfulness-works-only-women-brown-university-study-suggests-a7695946.html

This explains what i have for many a year felt.

Men are better at meditation. They can focus their energy and achieve  stillfullness.

Women are naturally introspective.  We need to work on being aware of our presence.

I think this goes a tremendous way into explaining male dominated religious practices, and how many women feel excluded...

And feminist dominated social services, and how many men feel excluded.

Is this just another word for focusing on what you are doing? It appears to be saying that mindfulness doesn't work for men because they are already mindful. It's pretty much a stereotype of the difference between men and women.

freediver wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 11:14am:

Is this just another word for focusing on what you are doing? It appears to be saying that mindfulness doesn't work for men because they are already mindful. It's pretty much a stereotype of the difference between men and women.

No. It is far more complex than just focusing on what you are doing.

You're way too full of theory - as Sir Lawrence Olivier once said to Dustin Hoffman when he was working so hard on the method acting approach to a scene - "Why don't you simply try acting, old boy?"

Why don't you simply try a relationship of equals, old girl?  It must be as dreary as hell spending all day listening to this convoluted and often artificially created theory about life, relationships and the universe... does anyone seriously want to work that hard?

I suppose, like all 'academic' learning, it makes you feel superior in discussion to trot out all these approved titles and definitions for discussion points and then frown on the great unwashed who haven't studied at the feet of the Delphic gurus of social theory - but frankly, my dear, most people don't give a damn, and are sick and tired of 'experts' in essentially nothing dictating the way their world is to run.

Grappler Truth Teller Feller wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 11:19am:

You're way too full of theory - as Sir Lawrence Olivier once said to Dustin Hoffman when he was working so hard on the method acting approach to a scene - "Why don't you simply try acting, old boy?" Why don't you simply try a relationship of equals, old girl?  It must be as dreary as hell spending all day listening to this convoluted and often artificially created theory about life, relationships and the universe... does anyone seriously want to work that hard? I suppose, like all 'academic' learning, it makes you feel superior in discussion to trot out all these approved titles and definitions for discussion points and then frown on the great unwashed who haven't studied at the feet of the Delphic gurus of social theory - but frankly, my dear, most people don't give a damn, and are sick and tired of 'experts' in essentially nothing dictating the way their world is to run.

I seek to understand. Men and women are different.

You sound like a second wave feminist. I've met your sort before.

People often find themselves needing help. Do you not think it beneficial that we offer them the best help available?

If the answer to women's problems is to be more like men, perhaps you have the wrong problem. You might help them solve differential equations, but will they find a good husband?

freediver wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 11:32am:

If the answer to women's problems is to be more like men, perhaps you have the wrong problem. You might help them solve differential equations, but will they find a good husband?

What an interesting perspective. You didn't lower yourself to consider that the answer to men's problems is to be more like women?

Of course not. You're just nor wired that way,are you.

May i suggest meditation?

In the interim, you're quite wrong. But don't let that stop you. It never has before.

Should I eat more chicken?

freediver wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 11:40am:

Should I eat more chicken?

You find the modern approach to psychological therapy and how it is not serving men amusing?

Do you think because it is not relevant to you it's not relevant to any of your users?

Do you find a person seeking help funny?

mothra wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 11:25am:

Grappler Truth Teller Feller wrote on May 20th, 2017 at 11:19am: You're way too full of theory - as Sir Lawrence Olivier once said to Dustin Hoffman when he was working so hard on the method acting approach to a scene - "Why don't you simply try acting, old boy?" Why don't you simply try a relationship of equals, old girl?  It must be as dreary as hell spending all day listening to this convoluted and often artificially created theory about life, relationships and the universe... does anyone seriously want to work that hard? I suppose, like all 'academic' learning, it makes you feel superior in discussion to trot out all these approved titles and definitions for discussion points and then frown on the great unwashed who haven't studied at the feet of the Delphic gurus of social theory - but frankly, my dear, most people don't give a damn, and are sick and tired of 'experts' in essentially nothing dictating the way their world is to run. I seek to understand. Men and women are different. You sound like a second wave feminist. I've met your sort before. People often find themselves needing help. Do you not think it beneficial that we offer them the best help available?

Now there you go again - everyone must have a label attached and be slotted into a nice little box - never happen...that's one of the traps of over-academising everything... people don't fit into neat little boxes to be handled at whim by the gurus and their acolytes...

Oh - the absolute horror of being labeled a 'feminist' of any kind... I am The World's Greatest Anti-Feminist - I espouse quality for all, not preferential treatment for some...

That's the same as some theorist trying to label me a Trotsykite or something, even a National Socialist, for wanting to enhance this nation and  its people first and foremost while protecting proper civil and legal rights.

As for 'psychologists' - do you know the difference between the staff and the inmates in an asylum?  One set has the keys to the doors....

Saying you sound like a second wave feminist is ascribing you a box?

Calm the bugger down, snowflake.

I merely meant that you see no inherent difference between the sexes. A Marxist ideology that is well outdated. I've had many an exchange with second wave feminists. They're wrong.

So are you.

Science and observation has out stepped you.

You now have two choices. Adapt or remain an anachronism.

Your choice.

Hi Mothra, do you practice mediation yourself? If you do I have some advice.

Your unhealthy and toxic lifestyle is undermining all of the possible benefits of the meditation.

A quick scan of the boards shows you've been posting since early yesterday afternoon and into the wee hours of the night then starting up again very early this morning. For what, to hand someone their arse? To get a little internet win?

That doesn't sound very mindful to me.

In contrast, here's how yours truly has spent the last 24 hours or so.

330pm Picked up 1stborn from school and straight to the beach for a surf until after dark. I scored a lovely big floaty 9' mal during the week and we had a blast on it. (I bought it from Japanese backpacker so I'm naming it Yamoto).

After 8 hours of sleep (minus 20 mins to do a nappy and make a bottle) woke at 645, made  breakfast for 3, cut the oranges then out the door to coach a netball team. (nice 20-17 win girls)

After netball, I went for a 5km run then home for a quick core strength workout.
In between this I also cooked dinner, did a load of washing and baked some brownies for 1st born to take to a party and read to her for 30 mins before  bed.

You need to take some time away from the virtual world and get out into real world. A good brisk walk on the beach or esplanade perhaps?

If you need a coach to get your life back on track, I'd be more than willing to help, it's pretty obvious you need it.

All the best
Gordy.

mothra wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 12:03pm:

Saying you sound like a second wave feminist is ascribing you a box? Calm the bugger down, snowflake. I merely meant that you see no inherent difference between the sexes. A Marxist ideology that is well outdated. I've had many an exchange with second wave feminists. They're wrong. So are you. Science and observation has out stepped you. You now have two choices. Adapt or remain an anachronism. Your choice.

1.  You are allocating to me a box by defining my position as anything at all.

2.  Ad hominem does your argument no good.

3.  'Marxist' - again with  the little labeled box

4.  What 'science' was that?  Observation?  I observe differently, and I've never said men and women were the same - I've always said all individuals are different, and that men and women are different - you miss that?  You are obfuscating over the difference between suggesting forming a viable relationship between the two as equals and some alleged statement that they are the same.

5.  I have no such limited choice - I can be whatever I want, and neither of those labels fit me, and I have zero obligation to accept that there is even any need for labeling into some category to suit something with which I disagree and in which I have little to no interest.

I've argued with many a social science based person - they are easy meat, because they always function from pre-conceived positions without reference to proof and truth, and always seek to pursue the 'official' line.

You are still continuing in this over-academised approach to real life... never happen.

Why not simply try real life, old girl?

Gordy, you're absolutely the last person to talk to me about online time.

Don't you have a newborn? Yet you are always here. Like always. First thing in the morning until late at night. All day, every day.

So i was online yesterday at work. You were here. I logged back on after the family went to bed and i couldn't sleep. You were here. The family went to the markets this morning (i was excused because i didn't sleep well) and then off to the movies.  Throughout it all, you've been here.

When i had newborns, nothing could keep me from them. I was all over their little preciousness like white on rice. Didn't want to miss a moment. But you'te online, yes? It must be more important to you.

Meanwhile you're evidencing to your daghter that the woman does all the work. Go you.

mothra wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 1:55pm:

Gordy, you're absolutely the last person to talk to me about online time. Don't you have a newborn? Yet you are always here. Like always. First thing in the morning until late at night. All day, every day. So i was online yesterday at work. You were here. I logged back on after the family went to bed and i couldn't sleep. You were here. The family went to the markets this morning (i was excused because i didn't sleep well) and then off to the movies.  Throughout it all, you've been here. When i had newborns, nothing could keep me from them. I was all over their little preciousness like white on rice. Didn't want to miss a moment. But you'te online, yes? It must be more important to you. Meanwhile you're evidencing to your daghter that the woman does all the work. Go you.

Click click click ;) 

Did you miss the bit about ME cooking dinner, making brownies, doing a load of washing, a 2am nappy and bottle and breakfast?

Are you going to hand anyone their arse today?

Our nanny is popping over in an hour, Mrs G and I are off for a bit of alone time, stroll on the beach then a bite to eat.

Enjoy your arvo, perhaps a brisk walk on the esplanade will make you feel better.

Always. Online.

mothra wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 11:45am:

freediver wrote on May 20th, 2017 at 11:40am: Should I eat more chicken? You find the modern approach to psychological therapy and how it is not serving men amusing? Do you think because it is not relevant to you it's not relevant to any of your users? Do you find a person seeking help funny?

Your mind is wandering mothra. Have you forgotten to do something?

mothra wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 2:09pm:

Always. Online.

Aside from my business I trade equities so I hit the computer early in the morning to see what's happened overnight in the USA and have a think about my positions for the day, I also clear my emails, and sometimes a quick morning post here.

I have 3 desktop computers. One that never goes online (airgapped) one that I use for trading and banking only and one that I use for internet and email which stays on 24/7, so I'm probably always logged in here.

Right now, I'm bashing out a few invoices which bores me to tears. This is my 3rd post of the day, you?  ;D

The difference is, although I'm logged in, I'm not posting through the night, into the witching hour and up early, as you are time and time and time again....getting little wins, handing people their arse.

Yesterday 1stborn and I rode Yamato 2up, while you were probably here, handing someone their arse.

freediver wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 2:16pm:

mothra wrote on May 20th, 2017 at 11:45am: freediver wrote on May 20th, 2017 at 11:40am: Should I eat more chicken? You find the modern approach to psychological therapy and how it is not serving men amusing? Do you think because it is not relevant to you it's not relevant to any of your users? Do you find a person seeking help funny? Your mind is wandering mothra. Have you forgotten to do something?

Nope. Crystal  clear.

Would you like to take this opportunity to belittle anyone on the forum who may be seeking psychological help?

The floor is yours. Don't mind Gordy. He's a fixture.

mothra wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 2:26pm:

freediver wrote on May 20th, 2017 at 2:16pm: mothra wrote on May 20th, 2017 at 11:45am: freediver wrote on May 20th, 2017 at 11:40am: Should I eat more chicken? You find the modern approach to psychological therapy and how it is not serving men amusing? Do you think because it is not relevant to you it's not relevant to any of your users? Do you find a person seeking help funny? Your mind is wandering mothra. Have you forgotten to do something? Nope. Crystal  clear. Would you like to take this opportunity to belittle anyone on the forum who may be seeking psychological help? The floor is yours. Don't mind Gordy. He's a fixture.

Except for that fact that you've been here solidly since yesterday arvo, click click click, handing people their arses :) Feel good?

Here's my 24hrs in pictorial form.

Arvo surf at Bondi
https://image.ibb.co/iTL92a/2017_05_19_16_59_52.jpg

Coaching a netball team and handing the the opposition their arses (while you were here click click clicking, handing people their arses)
https://image.ibb.co/bOBtTF/2017_05_20_10_51_14.jpg

5km run around Centennial Pk, stopped to snap the lovely autumn colour.
https://image.ibb.co/iqXdvv/2017_05_20_12_01_11.jpg

Nope. Since this morning.

Are you obsessing about the online time of anonymous people? When you have a newborn to enjoy?

Last thing on my mind when i had a newborn was computers... let alone the online activity of other people.

Good thing you've got your wife in line, hey Gordy.

mothra wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 2:53pm:

Nope. Since this morning. Are you obsessing about the online time of anonymous people? When you have a newborn to enjoy? Last thing on my mind when i had a newborn was computers... let alone the online activity of other people. Good thing you've got your wife in line, hey Gordy.

How I manage my family is my business. Do you think it's ethical for you to use my family as a point of argument against me?

Isn't it funny, when I ping you, Ionly ping you, but you constantly bring my family into it. Always.

I put you in exactly the same category as Greg who sinks to unimaginably disgusting depths to make a point just to win an argument.
All to hand someone their arse. Good on you.

You Mothra, are a foul individual.

Did i strike a nerve?

I don't believe for a second that you have a newborn. No-one with a newborn would pull the hours you do on here.

Not unless they were a narcissist who had dutifully trained their wife.

I've been through it. Twice. And my children have years on them but i still don't pull the online hours you do.

I think you're either full of crap or deserving of a bollocking.

My money is on the former.

mothra wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 3:09pm:

Did i strike a nerve? I don't believe for a second that you have a newborn. No-one with a newborn would pull the hours you do on here. Not unless they were a narcissist who had dutifully trained their wife. I've been through it. Twice. And my children have years on them but i still don't pull the online hours you do. I think you're either full of crap or deserving of a bollocking. My money is on the former.

Mrs G and I are off to the beach,  back later, hope you hand some people their arses while we're having a swim.

Gordon wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 3:00pm:

mothra wrote on May 20th, 2017 at 2:53pm: Nope. Since this morning. Are you obsessing about the online time of anonymous people? When you have a newborn to enjoy? Last thing on my mind when i had a newborn was computers... let alone the online activity of other people. Good thing you've got your wife in line, hey Gordy. How I manage my family is my business. Do you think it's ethical for you to use my family as a point of argument against me? Isn't it funny, when I ping you, Ionly ping you, but you constantly bring my family into it. Always. I put you in exactly the same category as Greg who sinks to unimaginably disgusting depths to make a point just to win an argument. All to hand someone their arse. Good on you. You Mothra, are a foul individual.

yep

Sprintcyclist wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 10:56pm:

Gordon wrote on May 20th, 2017 at 3:00pm: mothra wrote on May 20th, 2017 at 2:53pm: Nope. Since this morning. Are you obsessing about the online time of anonymous people? When you have a newborn to enjoy? Last thing on my mind when i had a newborn was computers... let alone the online activity of other people. Good thing you've got your wife in line, hey Gordy. How I manage my family is my business. Do you think it's ethical for you to use my family as a point of argument against me? Isn't it funny, when I ping you, Ionly ping you, but you constantly bring my family into it. Always. I put you in exactly the same category as Greg who sinks to unimaginably disgusting depths to make a point just to win an argument. All to hand someone their arse. Good on you. You Mothra, are a foul individual. yep

Oh no! Sprint the sexist, racist "good Christians who gets off on the death of vulnerable people doesn't like me!

What will i do?

What's wrong with dutifully training your wife to follow her natural instincts and duty to posterity?  If she was in such a parlous state re nurturing and socialisation of the infant that she needed remedial classes - what more can I say about the real plight of women these days and their lack of connection with their inner woman?

Dutifully training your wife?

mothra wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 11:06pm:

Dutifully training your wife?

Remedial classes...

Jesus Christ.

mothra wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 11:07pm:

Jesus Christ.

Ah - I see you've been reading my latest short story.....

freediver wrote on May 20^th, 2017 at 11:14am:

Is this just another word for focusing on what you are doing? It appears to be saying that mindfulness doesn't work for men because they are already mindful. It's pretty much a stereotype of the difference between men and women.

yeah, men focus much better on a single job.

It's much more productive and rewarding than running around like a chook with it's head cut off trying to do EVERYTHING all at once.

this multitasking rubbish makes people look really busy and important, it's unproductive and error prone.

;D

I guess that why I stick around.

Pole dancing is good for mindfulness. You don't get distracted when you are upside down with your legs spread.

freediver wrote on May 21^st, 2017 at 8:02am:

Pole dancing is good for mindfulness. You don't get distracted when you are upside down with your legs spread.

The picture you paint of Mothra 'pole dancing' is causing my breakfast to reappear on the plate...... ;D