https://i.ibb.co/KhW8xkj/FB-IMG-1684024816676.jpg

;D

https://i.ibb.co/9whSH3r/images.jpg

.

---

.

---

.

---

  :o

---

;D

---

;D again...

---

"A Russian and an Irish wrestler were set to square off for the Olympic gold medal.

Before the match, the Irish wrestler's trainer came to him and said, "Now, don't forget all the research we've done on this Russian. He's never lost a match because of this 'pretzel' hold he has. It ties you up in knots. Whatever you do, do not let him get you in that hold! If he does, you're finished."

The Irishman nodded in acknowledgment. As the match started, the Irishman and the Russian circled each other several times, looking for an opening.

All of a sudden, the Russian lunged forward, grabbing the Irishman and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold.

A sigh of disappointment arose from the crowd and the trainer buried his face in his hands, for he knew all was lost. He couldn't watch the inevitable happen.

Suddenly, there was a long, high pitched scream, then a cheer from the crowd and the trainer raised his eyes just in time to watch the Russian go flying up in the air. His back hit the mat with a thud and the Irishman collapsed on top of him, making the pin and winning the match.

The trainer was astounded. When he finally got his wrestler alone, he asked, "How did you ever get out of that hold? No one has ever done it before!"

The wrestler answered, "Well, I was ready to give up when he got me in that hold but at the last moment, I opened my eyes and saw this pair of testicles right in front of my face. I had nothing to lose so with my last ounce of strength, I stretched out my neck and bit those buggers just as hard as I could."

The trainer exclaimed, "Oh, so that's what finished him off?!!!"

"Not really. You'd be amazed how strong you get when you bite your own balls..."

OK, thinking caps on, people.

Who can tell me what this is referring to?

Hint: You'd probably need to be around about my age (65) to get this.

Hint 2: What it is referring to was released in May 1971.

Go!

8-)

---

No takers, huh?

Meh... OK...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c9lh7lqZojc

Signs - The Five Man Electrical Band 1971

And the sign said
"Long-haired freaky people
Need not apply"
So I tucked my hair up under my hat
And I went in to ask him why
He said, "You look like a fine upstandin' young man
I think you'll do"
So I took off my hat and said, "Imagine that
Huh, me workin' for you"
Whoa

Sign, sign
Everywhere a sign
Blockin' out the scenery
Breakin' my mind
Do this, don't do that
Can't you read the sign?

52 years ago... now I feel really old. :(

8-)

---

:D  :D

---

Carl D wrote on May 28^th, 2023 at 9:54pm:

:D  :D

;D ;D
We're those comments from Bobby?

lol... I was thinking about Sir Nail when I posted that.

Oh, while I'm here:

---

https://img.ifunny.co/images/33678feb0be2ae97ff7481447203eab4f572c8343b645a30d5136ca86cc29ddd_1.jpg

:)

---

:o

---

:)

---

;D

---

This is probably easier than some of the CAPTCHA's I've had to do lately.

:)

---

Thanks muchly for the laughs chaps!  Much appreciated
during my otherwise boring day.

         ;D

You're welcome Geoff.

Oh, while I'm here...

---

:)

---

Unfortunate photographs taken at work No.137.

;D

---

As seen on Twitter:

https://i.imgur.com/AbyaoTF.jpg

;D

:o

https://i.imgur.com/cEfEjm8.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/zREIPpJ.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/ZJr5YAj.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/6ACVWzX.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/guoWUOb.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/dT1BxmO.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/5dkGlzS.jpg

No picture this time but still funny.

https://twitter.com/mhdksafa/status/1669444706395205633


Quote:

Someone took a screenshot of one of my tweets and emailed it to my work demanding they fire me. It eventually ended up on the CEO’s desk. After long discussion with me (CEO), I chose to not fire myself.

;D

;D

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.

---

.

---

:)

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;D

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“Camel Tow” takes some beating!

LOL!  ;D

---

Bit like the car that wouldn’t start so wife calls husband

“What temperature is the engine?”

Wife: I don’t know, looks like a man sitting on the loo!

it was -4°

https://i.imgur.com/ANMHrqO.jpg

A lawyer is trying to call his clients.

The phone rings and a little boy, in a whisper, says, ” Hello”

Lawyer: “Is your mommy there?”

Boy: (whispers) “Yes.”

Lawyer: “Can I speak to her?”

Boy: (whispers) “She’s very busy.”

Lawyer: “Is your daddy there?”

Boy: (whispers) “Yes.”

Lawyer: “Can I speak to him?”

Boy: (whispers) “No, He’s very busy.”

Lawyer: “Is there anyone else there?”

Boy: (whispers) “Yes, the fire department.”

Lawyer: “Can I talk to one of them?”

Boy: (whispers) “No, They’re busy too.”

Lawyer: “Is there anybody ELSE there?”

Boy: (whispers) “The police department.”

Lawyer: “Well, can I talk to one of them?”

Boy: (whispers) “No, They’re busy too.”

Lawyer: “Let me get this straight, your mother, father, the fire department and the police department are all in your house, and they are all busy.

What are they doing?”

Boy: (whispers) “They are all looking for me.”

;D

:)

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Isn't that the truth these days?

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lol... what?

;D

---

:)

---

:)

---

hehe..  ;D

---

$0. My wife gave another $50.

Hey son, I'm going to need you to clean out the garage this weekend.

Son:  https://twitter.com/AwakenedOutlaw/status/1690985590878302209

Frank wrote on Aug 15^th, 2023 at 4:52pm:

Hey son, I'm going to need you to clean out the garage this weekend. Son:  https://twitter.com/AwakenedOutlaw/status/1690985590878302209

Brilliant!! I thought it was never going to finish.

Meanwhile...

:)

---

;D

Those The Far Side cartoons by Gary Larson are great.

---

Carl D wrote on Aug 15^th, 2023 at 9:42pm:

Frank wrote on Aug 15th, 2023 at 4:52pm: Hey son, I'm going to need you to clean out the garage this weekend. Son:  https://twitter.com/AwakenedOutlaw/status/1690985590878302209 Brilliant!! I thought it was never going to finish. Meanwhile... :)

Yes, absolutely brilliant.
That kid will go a long way. He should append that clip to any application for a job or scholarship and he'd be snapped up. 

Frank wrote on Aug 15^th, 2023 at 4:52pm:

Hey son, I'm going to need you to clean out the garage this weekend. Son:  https://twitter.com/AwakenedOutlaw/status/1690985590878302209

LOL... outstanding!  A wonderful example of
physics and the conservation and transfer of
kinetic and potential energy.

Kids should be watching this sort of stuff rather
than endless and ultimately pointless ball games.

Oh...  and this...

          https://www.awesomeinventions.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/orange-girl.jpg

Might have to get a few of these.

"PICK UP WOMEN AT BARS!"
"GREAT FOR OVER-THE-HILL BACHELORS!"

8-)

---

lol  ;D

---

:)

---

Couple of good ones there, Carl  ;D ;D ;D

Carl D wrote on Aug 15^th, 2023 at 9:42pm:

Frank wrote on Aug 15th, 2023 at 4:52pm: Hey son, I'm going to need you to clean out the garage this weekend. Son:  https://twitter.com/AwakenedOutlaw/status/1690985590878302209 Brilliant!! I thought it was never going to finish.

Tell you what ... that clip has to be passed on. It’s just too amazing NOT to share.

Wonder how long it took him to set all that up?

;D

---

I've known a few people at a couple of places where I've worked who would do something like this.

---

;D

---

:)

---

;D

---

Hehe...

---

All good ones Carl.   ;D

     https://i.postimg.cc/Z5bg00bM/Screenshot-2023-09-27-at-03-37-36-FUNNY-MEMES-The-150-Funniest-Memes-Of-All-Time.png

;D ;D ;D Topic!

:-/

---

:)

Another great The Far Side cartoon by Gary Larson.

(I wonder how many here will understand it?)  :-/

---

;D

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Carl D wrote on Sep 27^th, 2023 at 9:28pm:

:-/

;D ;D

:)

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LOL! Oh dear!

;D ;D ;D

---

:)

---

;D ;D ;D

https://twitter.com/TheFreds/status/1714213479857455534

https://i.ibb.co/FDNrNyJ/do-they-not-realize-that-in-palestine-queer-people-v0-xzptr4gikotb1.jpg

There's no real 'attraction' to same sex relationships.
Just like there's no real 'attraction' in magnets when trying to force the same polarities together.

It's just physics. What on earth are they learning in Universities these days? :-?

:o

---

Of course.

---

;D

Look out, New York Times.

Louisa is on to you.

https://nitter.net/loobylouwales/status/1717770767394640041#m


Quote:

I’m no prude but this is the second time in a week the New York Times spelling bee has been a bit blue.

Followed by:

https://nitter.net/loobylouwales/status/1718194973437493377#m


Quote:

Third time in a week the New York Times spelling bee has had this word in it. What gives?

Personally, I'd be too afraid to ask them at this stage.

;D ;D ;D

    ;D    ;D    ;D     ^

lol.  ;D

---

I can just imagine aquascoot riding one of these.

---

:)

---

::)

---

;D

---

Me too!  ;D

---

;D

Don't be surprised if many people would use that tap for drinking water - not realising the illusion.

;D

---

https://twitter.com/flapprdotnet/status/1724219090166833383

Frank wrote on Nov 17^th, 2023 at 2:58pm:

https://twitter.com/flapprdotnet/status/1724219090166833383

;D

:o

---

Carl D wrote on Nov 18^th, 2023 at 7:08pm:

:o

;D

Carl D wrote on Nov 18^th, 2023 at 7:08pm:

:o

;D
That one's a classic!

Hehe..

---

Yes indeed!

---

https://i.imgur.com/hXZN8X5.jpg

;D ;D ;D

https://twitter.com/buitengebieden/status/1725420984180552173

Frank wrote on Nov 19^th, 2023 at 2:27pm:

https://twitter.com/buitengebieden/status/1725420984180552173

That's terrible Frank! ;D
Looked like the Biden Campaign.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/F_TC-LLWEAAXcJ9?.jpg

Lemme help you...

https://twitter.com/ThebestFigen/status/1726747443264377006

Gordon wrote on May 15^th, 2023 at 11:27am:

https://i.ibb.co/KhW8xkj/FB-IMG-1684024816676.jpg

Haha yep!

But others needed to be photoshopped.

https://i.imgur.com/T6r9HFr.jpg

;D

---

That is got to be one of the cleverest images I've ever seen!  ;D
Careful what you say, mud can stick.

I think something was lost in the translation here.

;D ;D ;D

---

lol..  ;D

---

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GACvKm-XkAAPyxj?.jpg

Hehe... I bet something like this would sell well today.

Orgone Energy Accumulator

;D

---

Look up what they used to do with XRays!

Think about it.  :)

---

Nope. Still not getting it Carl. :-?

Jasin wrote on Dec 4^th, 2023 at 8:19am:

Nope. Still not getting it Carl. :-?

Hi Jas.

Does this help?

"... the words of the prophets are written on the subway walls"

Big hint: It's from the last verse of a famous song.

8-)

Amazon proof of delivery photo.

(Maybe this should also go in Cats and Critters?)

;D

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Carl D wrote on Dec 4^th, 2023 at 8:23am:

Jasin wrote on Dec 4th, 2023 at 8:19am: Nope. Still not getting it Carl. :-? Hi Jas. Does this help? "... the words of the prophets are written on the subway walls" Big hint: It's from the last verse of a famous song. 8-)

Ahh. I get it now. Thanks Carl.
Had me stumped on that one.

It was a simpler time before the Internet ruined our thinking.

;D

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https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GBEUa_sXcAA9zgd?.jpg

:)

---

;D

Oh No: Grandma Just Learned How To 'Like' Text Messages

"Oh no, she just liked an old text about my kidney stone," said one member of the family.

"What have I done?" asked the son responsible for teaching Grandma how to add a "like," "heart," or "haha" to any text message. "She's forgotten everything else I've ever taught her about her phone. Why, oh why did she remember this one?"

At publishing time, the Pendleton family had been swept up into another state of emergency after Grandpa learned to voice-dictate text messages.

Indeed they do.

;D

---

Only 'Trekkies' will probably get this one.

;D

---

It's called Gravitational Lensing.  ;)

;D

---

Another one for the Trekkies.

8-)

---

lol...  :o

---

OK, who wants to take a shot at the meaning of this?

I saw it straight away.

;D ;D

Hint: It helps if you're a 'Trekkie'.

---

The Wreath of Khan ;D

Jasin wrote on Dec 20^th, 2023 at 7:05pm:

The Wreath of Khan ;D

Yep.

;D

https://twitter.com/insultsrare/status/1737690571349582141/photo/1

lol..  ;D

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Gordon wrote on May 15^th, 2023 at 11:27am:

https://i.ibb.co/KhW8xkj/FB-IMG-1684024816676.jpg

;D
I just got it!
:D

Thinking caps on again, people.

Hint: it's referring to a Bruce Willis movie.

:)

OK, here's the answer:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kaBC5tJrff0

8-)

---

Oops.  :-[

---

;D

---

:o

---

:)

---

:-/

---

:o

---

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GDRI_vqa8AAQD7N?.jpg

;D

The Poison Garden

"Do you dare to enter?"

---

LOL!

I have a little list
They never will be missed

—Gilbert & Sullivan “The Mikado”

:o

---

;D ;D ;D

---

https://twitter.com/gunsnrosesgirl3/status/1747599775602442284

The comments

https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSF1NqTas/

     Should definitely be a lot more of this...

          https://i.postimg.cc/3xhPc7Tc/Screenshot-2024-01-23-at-07-33-14-ec6c7c937eb934ac64383c5f173d5eae-jpg-JPEG-Image-236-158-pixels.png

;D

---

Shout out to Monk on that one.  ;D

;D

---

lol..  ;D

---

Lol.  ;D

Frank wrote on Jan 8^th, 2024 at 5:58pm:

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GDRI_vqa8AAQD7N?.jpg

Is that Aussie ?

:)

---

Think about it...

---

8-)

---

:o ;D

---

Hehe..

---

After Death Of Immigration Bill, McConnell Gives Republicans Silent Treatment

https://media.babylonbee.com/articles/65c2a637b7a1265c2a637b7a13.jpg

All good!  ;D

The comments

https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSFNgP853/

Gordon wrote on Feb 8^th, 2024 at 5:54pm:

The comments https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSFNgP853/

Get it indi'ya.

;D

---

Hehe...

---

;D

https://twitter.com/NoContextHumans/status/1756421662495412228

;D

---

Frank wrote on Feb 12^th, 2024 at 4:33pm:

https://twitter.com/NoContextHumans/status/1756421662495412228

;D ;D

lol..  ;D

---

8-)

Jade Hameister


Quote:

After Hameister's 2016 TED talk was posted to YouTube, several comments were posted that said "make me a sandwich." Upon reaching the South Pole, she posed for a photo while holding a ham and cheese sandwich. In her social media post she invited the commenters to "ski 37 days and 600 km to the South Pole and you can eat it."

---

:o

---

;D

---

;D

---

https://twitter.com/trapdoor456/status/1759625410503979316

Now I understand that such 'Camel Hump Butts' are genetically appropriate out in the harsh arid, waterless regions of Africa - but honestly 'How does one find its way to the watering hole between those massive Boabs'?  :o

;D ;D ;D

---

Carl D wrote on Feb 29^th, 2024 at 3:20pm:

;D ;D ;D

You no like China? You bad. $500. Pay now.

Hey, don't laugh.
Aussie gave Monk $60 for an invisible cake. :D

8-)

---

:)

---

Patient: Give it to me straight, Doc.

Doctor: Well, I'm afraid you've got Tom Jones Disease.

Patient: Tom Jones Disease? I've never heard of it. Is it common?

Doctor: Well, it's not unusual.

:o

---

;D

---

8-)

---

Carl D wrote on Mar 12^th, 2024 at 6:11pm:

8-)

No get.

Frank wrote on Mar 12^th, 2024 at 9:19pm:

Carl D wrote on Mar 12th, 2024 at 6:11pm: 8-) No get.

Seven of Nine

7-Eleven

So, instead of Seven of Nine we have Seven of Eleven (7-Eleven).

:)

Carl D wrote on Mar 12^th, 2024 at 9:41pm:

Frank wrote on Mar 12th, 2024 at 9:19pm: Carl D wrote on Mar 12th, 2024 at 6:11pm: 8-) No get. Seven of Nine 7-Eleven So, instead of Seven of Nine we have Seven of Eleven (7-Eleven). :)

Ah. Ta.

(I have never heard of seven of nine or any of that fantasy stuff)



This should be a commercial for Pizza Hut
https://twitter.com/historyinmemes/status/1767539539873067014

Prince William Insists Royal Family Photo Unaltered


https://media.babylonbee.com/articles/65ef5e3db66f965ef5e3db66fb.jpg

;D

---

8-)

---

.

---

https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSFxHwyxs/

;D

---

Carl D wrote on Mar 15^th, 2024 at 6:48pm:

8-)

5 seconds for me.  ;D

;D ;D ;D

---

Monk and his Fat Housebreaker Sausages.  ;D

8-)

---

;D

---

;D ;D ;D

I wonder if Donald Trump uses this guy?

---

::)

---

;D

---

;D

---

Carl D wrote on May 25^th, 2024 at 10:03am:

;D

I would assume that there is a buffer separating the wild flowers with whatever they are doing on the other side of the fence.

If you have walked pass my place, you would notice that my yard looks like it does not get as much attention as the neighbouring yards. Right to the fenceline, you can see a clear contrast in the health of my yard with that of my neighbours.

You're not talking to your wild flowers? A buffer works well if it's 30 metres high but lonesome pollen will still drift.  Also a Maccas diluted in 5 litres water helps flowers.

Parts of my yard near the fenceline resembles the quality of that of my neighbours. As I said, both neighbours on either side have yards that are in proper maintenance. My yard gets a mow every 2 weeks (in summer) and every 4 weeks (in winter). I also put down potting mix and lawn seeds in August to try to revive the lawn after a winter's drought.

Sometimes, when my neighbours do their yard with lawn seeds, the seeds blow into my yard and make the lawn in sections look better than the rough other sections of the yard. I could imagine wild flowers blowing into the next yard. But that gate makes for a buffer from one yard to the other yard. What little wild flowers blow into the next yard would just be trimmed away by the gardeners.

Your best plan is several gates which you open when neighbours sow seeds. Check first which species they are broadcasting. Water lightly and spread mulch where needed.

;D

---

:o

---

No picture this time but I had a great laugh at this last Tuesday afternoon.

I was waiting for the council to empty the bins left near the road. Heard the sound of a truck that sounded a bit like the Veolia one that empties the bins.

Went to have a look but it wasn't the truck emptying the bins... it was a council truck with a big water tank on the back and they were going along watering the roadside trees... while it was pouring down with rain (and it had been raining most of the day).

So typical.

;D ;D ;D

:o

I feel like I need one of these for my front doorbell sometimes.

Claymore mine

---

Fucking knew it.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GOSZh0RWEAA8VMU?.jpg

:o

---

A woman in a supermarket is following a grandfather and his badly behaved grandson. He has his hands full with the child screaming for sweets, biscuits, and all sorts of things.

The grandfather is saying in a controlled voice: "Easy, William, we won't be long". Another outburst and she hears the grandfather calmly say, "It's okay William. Just a couple more minutes and we'll be out of here. Hang in there”.

At the checkout the little horror is throwing items out of the cart. Grandfather says again in a controlled voice, "William, relax buddy, don't get upset. We'll be home in five minutes, stay cool William."

Very impressed, the woman goes outside to where the grandfather is loading his groceries and the boy into the car. She says, "It's none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don't know how you did it. That whole time you kept your composure, and no matter how loud and disruptive he got, you just calmly kept saying that things would be okay. William is very lucky to have you as his grandfather."

"Thanks", says the grandfather, "but I am William, this little *******'s name is Kevin".

;D ;D ;D

:o

---

;D

---

Carl D wrote on Jun 11^th, 2024 at 6:21pm:

:o

https://nsarchive.gwu.edu/sites/default/files/thumbnails/image/162.jpg

They were optimistic for clearing conditions by Friday.

Could be house fires. Bushfires and volcanic lava are hotter. The specific 379 is unusual but.

chimera wrote on Jun 11^th, 2024 at 6:55pm:

Could be house fires. Bushfires and volcanic lava are hotter. The specific 379 is unusual but.

At 192°C, any human would not last 10 seconds of that temperature.

It's cooler at floor level. Place a towel over the head to filter smoke, have long sleeves and trousers and don't panic.

;D

---

:)

---

;D

---

Carl D wrote on Jun 11^th, 2024 at 6:23pm:

;D

She is getting ready for the Compass Cup, held yearly in Mt Compass south of Adelaide‚—yup, cows are “raced.”

:)

---

https://video.twimg.com/ext_tw_video/1343478735501062146/pu/pl/8v9PIkZkA0HPr-Cu.m3u8?tag=10

https://pleated-jeans.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/funny-pictures-6-24-24-37.jpg

https://pleated-jeans.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/06/funny-pictures-6-24-24-27.jpg

:)

---

Thanks for not showing a ton of brains being shovelled out of a plane.

Carl D wrote on Jun 26^th, 2024 at 5:58pm:

:)

https://loginportal123.funnyjunk.com/pictures/Brains_24e521_2780479.jpg

;D

---

:o

---

:)

---

;D

---

.

:o

---

;D

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Carl D wrote on Jul 1^st, 2024 at 7:22pm:

:o

LOLOLOLOL!

Carl D wrote on Jul 1^st, 2024 at 7:23pm:

;D

LOL! Oh dear!

https://x.com/YukonStrong/status/1807946688591810798

;D

---

.

---

;D

---

lol..  ;D ;D

---

:o

---

;D

---

;D

---

that is so weird- WILL NOT KILL YOU?    ;D ;D ;D

So that's the exit from the prison, onto Death Valley at 45 degrees C.

;D

---

Buddhists go to shops where there's nothing for less than $2.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkVvNxJsdDI

"Awkward Statues"

---

;D

---

:o

---

“Walk FASTER!”

;D ;D

;D

---

.

---

;D

---

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GTHHSjjWwAEYM5B?.jpg

:)

---

;D

---

;D

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Carl D wrote on Jul 28^th, 2024 at 11:58am:

;D

This author is evidently a graduate of Chez Gordon college of the evolution of the English language.

:)

---

;D

---

.

---

:)

---

.

Carl D wrote on Aug 6^th, 2024 at 5:56pm:

:)

;D


Not only evolution but agriculture, too:


WORLD — Scientists are now suggesting that prehistoric women were superior hunters to men, but not due to physical prowess or strategic skills. According to the researchers, it all comes down to one simple factor: their incessant talking.

"We've long speculated about the hunting dynamics and gender roles of our ancient ancestors," explained Dr. Burt Hudson, lead researcher on the study. "But our findings indicate that prehistoric women were so adept at endless small-talk that animals, overwhelmed by the constant chatter, simply dropped dead out of sheer exhaustion."

The study, conducted over several years in various prehistoric sites, revealed compelling evidence. "We found ancient cave paintings that showed while men were busy grunting and pointing at things, the women subdued massive animals by using only their voices," Dr. Hudson elaborated. "Remarkably, it appears that unendurably endless stories without a point and constant questions — not pointy spears — are what slew the beasts."

At publishing time, researchers discovered that a mass extinction led to a shortage of game, which caused the women to come back to the caves and talk to their husbands, forcing the husbands to flee the caves and invent farming.

Oops..  :-[

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;D

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Carl D wrote on Aug 10^th, 2024 at 7:26pm:

;D

I knew of a drug dealer that lost his girlfriend to police officer. She ran off with him and basically were planning on having a baby together.

The guy was devastated. But he blamed his own illegal activities for why he lost her. Being in such a dangerous "profession", he was exposing his (now ex) girlfriend to dangers that someone as innocent as her should not have to face. The drug dealer basically ended his relationship with his drug dealer mates. He did a few deals to make a little money. Then he handed the remainder of his heroin to his drug dealer friends. He was not going to rat out his friends to police, as he held a grudge against the police force for allowing one of their kind to take what the man believed belonged to him. He was clean of drug use. He still smoked a little pot from now and then. But, eventually (over a period of a few weeks) he quit that. Then he quit smoking cigarettes, too. He tried alcohol to numb his pain. But he weaned himself off that, too. He decided to try wine... once a week... on a Sunday. The Anglican church was very receptive to having him as part of the congregation.

Over time, he went from no longer being a unlikeable, yet rich, drug dealer. His job as a mechanic started to get more meaningful. He was the type of person who took his job more seriously. He was a good worker for what he did. But, he was half-arseing it for part of his time. His boss was impressed with his attitude change, and offered him more flexible work hours and a possibility of managing the site when the boss was away.

Let us call this former drug dealer, Kevin. Not his real name, though. Kevin basically recognised his failures as something from that to learn. He did start a new relationship with a new girl -- an ambulance officer -- who knew of Kevin's reputation. Her name, for the purpose of this story, is Clara.

She came to the conclusion that Kevin was redeemable. Slowly, the bond between the two grew to a point where Kevin and Clara they were regularly dating. It had been 8 months since Kevin's ex girlfriend dumped him. But, Kevin had not forgotten her. He decided to write a letter of emancipation to his ex-girlfriend, just to console himself until he was ready to forgive himself. It read:

"Helen. Please forgive me for what I have done to you. You do not deserve someone that showed you the lack of respect that you do. I understand that you were scared. I made it seem that I took you for granted. It was right of you to leave me. I did not deserve the honour of having you around. However, I want to earn back your respect, and not just buy your love with the money I once had in abundance. I, too have moved on and have found someone else. Although I feel that we are not to ever reconcile, I do believe that we can reconnect as friends. That is the very least I want from you. But I understand that we are never to be together again. I love my new girlfriend to ever want someone else. Please respect who she is and what she does. For we know that the emergency services share something in common for the good of this town. But it is a common understanding that we (you and I) do not understand directly. As you are a school teacher and I am a mechanic. But I know that I have to be free of the poison that has made my girlfriend's life overburdening in her employment. I hope things work out well between you and Steve.

Kev"

(continued)

Kevin tore the note out of his A4 note pad and affixed the note to his fridge with a fridge magnet. Clara would come by Kevin's home every now and then to visit. The relationship was very much consolidated. There was nothing that Kevin would not do for Clara. He was trying to be the ultimate gentleman. And although Clara knew that Kevin was trying so hard to please her, she loved the old-school attention of romance that you would only see in those classic movies. It was "Gone with the wind"-esque.

What Clara did not like about Kevin was his holding onto the past. She spotted the note and read it a few times. Although Clara did find the note sweet, it appeared that Kevin was not fully committed to the relationship. The next time that Clara was around at Kevin's place, Clara asked him about the note. Kevin just passed it off as the unburdening note.

One day after church, Kevin was out at a coffee shop. It was his usual coffee shop that he liked to go to in the mid-morning, every Sunday. But this time, something unexpected happened. Helen was sitting at a table with Steve. That seemed unusual, for he knew that Steve was the type that worked late on a Saturday night. However, Kevin decided to get his usual flat white coffee. This time, "to go". It seemed that Steve had spotted Kevin before Kevin had spotted Steve. Steve keeped watch of Kevin as Kevin walked pass. Unpeturbed, Kevin went in, got his coffee and left without a fuss. Helen watched Kevin exit the coffee shop. She seemed a little surprised by Kevin's appearance change. Formally dressed, healthy look, and Kevin no longer had that shaven head look. But, she recognised Kevin's sleave tattoo. The unmistakable "Don't tread on me" cobra tattoo. Steve was not going to let that insult from Helen pass him unremarked.

"Don't look at that junkie dealer" quipped Steve, as Kevin walked on.
"You obviously were not talking about me" Kevin responded, as he walked back to his late model car.

It became apparent over the next month that Kevin was running into these two by accident, regardless of whether Kevin went on a Saturday or a Sunday morning. Kevin decided to give that coffee place a miss. He went to a coffee store on Red Hill for a few weeks. But it was not long before Helen and Steve were there sitting around talking. Kevin decided to go back to his coffee shop near the cinema. A week later, Helen and Steve were back sitting in their usual spot. This time Kevin decided to get his coffee at the nearby cinema and see a movie "Mad Max: Fury Road". Being wound up by the apparent harassment from a police officer, it was difficult to concentrate on the movie. But, he got the gist of the storyline and fell asleep before the movie ended. He awoke to the cleaner telling him that that movie had ended. Kevin got up and left the theatre. Down in the foyer was Helen at one end of the room. Clara was waiting for Kevin at the other end. Kevin had his phone turned back on and saw that Clara had been trying to call him a few times. But, Clara knew that Kevin only turned off his phone when he was at the movies.

Kevin walked in the direction of Clara, feeling a little guilty of going to the movies by himself. Helen intercepted Kevin's attention as she strided towards Kevin.

"I need to talk to you" Helen demanded, though not forcefully.
"I think it is best that you and I not talk any more. For your sake" remind Kevin.

(continued)

(continued)

Clara walked up to them both, a little confused. Kevin immediately introduced Helen to Clara and how he knew Helen. Clara was not impressed with Kevin. She suspected an affair. However, Helen, being the voice of reason, gave a straight-to-the-point demand that she gets that ring that she left at Kevin's place, the day she moved out. She also wanted to pick a few things that she knows is still at Kev's place. Kevin said that she could come around later the next night and pick up the items, when he got home from work. Clara just told Helen to just get the items that night and be done with it. Helen agreed with Clara. Kevin decided to clean up the house with Clara to make sure that there was nothing that Helen had also left behind at his house. Kevin could not find the ring. He did find a metal bracelet, that he had never seen before. He put the bracelet on the bar fridge. Clara could not find this mysterious ring, either.

(continued)

:)

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;D

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https://iili.io/d1KsXov.md.png

:o

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One for the Trekkies.  :)

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;D

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This will upset the Flat Earthers.

And I'm sure we have a few of them here.

:)

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Carl D wrote on Aug 19^th, 2024 at 5:13pm:

This will upset the Flat Earthers. And I'm sure we have a few of them here. :)

On a spherical globe that IS a straight line.
Check it out if you have a globe.

Frank wrote on Aug 19^th, 2024 at 5:35pm:

Carl D wrote on Aug 19th, 2024 at 5:13pm: This will upset the Flat Earthers. And I'm sure we have a few of them here. :) On a spherical globe that IS a straight line.

Correct.

https://x.com/Globalstats11/status/1825390467531379023


Quote:

For anyone wondering how

And, for a good laugh:

https://x.com/callmekartikey/status/1825391704490348610


Quote:

Now let’s see some dumbs claim earth is flat.

"How the Dinosaurs went extinct according to flat earthers"

;D

.

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Oops.  :-[

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:)

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:)

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:o

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:o

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Carl D wrote on Sep 18^th, 2024 at 6:54pm:

:o

Don't worry. They employed "Wile E. Coyote" to paint a tunnel on the side of the biggest rock blocking the road. Traffic resumed within a day of the rock slide, with only minor inconvenience.

UnSubRocky wrote on Sep 24^th, 2024 at 8:37am:

Don't worry. They employed "Wile E. Coyote" to paint a tunnel on the side of the biggest rock blocking the road. Traffic resumed within a day of the rock slide, with only minor inconvenience.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4iWvedIhWjM

;D

;D

Btw. Where's that Memes of Kamala Harris tipping Biden out of his wheelchair (weekend at Biden's) off the cliff? ;D

It was a very prophetic memes. It came true!!! ;D ;D ;D

https://i.imgur.com/jZ0wrB2.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/3DZj8bm.jpg

;D

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lol.

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Only a few children love it. The others are not required to participate.

Only a few parents need to apply emotional blackmail. This is optional, and in my opinion bad parenting.

Scientific knowledge isn't really necessary. It's a bit like competitive sports: it brings out the best in a few, but it makes most kids feel like poo.

Kids who grasp special relativity, should not lord it over those who don't. Neither of them should feel inferior to the kids who grasp general relativity. Science isn't the school football club, nor the school cheerleading squad. You don't need to "make the team" to be good enough.

Carl D wrote on Oct 7^th, 2024 at 10:55pm:

lol.

It's arguably the best browser.

But some of us who distrust Google's ambitions, use Opera. Or if you prefer something weighty which takes a minute to load, you could consider Firefox. There are secure browsers too, but after reading the terms and conditions I can't name them.

https://i.imgur.com/f1Yjbx4.jpg

;D ;D ;D

29% of the audience also didn't know.. lol.

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How good is this

https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSj1WudEy/

Aurora Complexus wrote on Oct 7^th, 2024 at 11:24pm:

Carl D wrote on Oct 7th, 2024 at 10:55pm: lol. It's arguably the best browser. But some of us who distrust Google's ambitions, use Opera. Or if you prefer something weighty which takes a minute to load, you could consider Firefox. There are secure browsers too, but after reading the terms and conditions I can't name them.

Chromium?


Quote:

Browsers based on Chromium[edit] In addition to Google Chrome, many other actively developed browsers are based on the Chromium code. Most of these are proprietary, like Chrome, but some remain FOSS, like Chromium.[75][76][77][78] Proprietary[edit] Arc Amazon Silk Avast Comodo Dragon DuckDuckGo Epic Maxthon Microsoft Edge Naver Whale NetFront Opera Puffin Samsung Internet Sleipnir SRWare Iron https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chromium_(web_browser)

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https://i.imgur.com/0FLzAC7.jpg

Captain Nemo wrote on Oct 20^th, 2024 at 9:42am:

https://i.imgur.com/0FLzAC7.jpg

;D
A friend in need is a friend indeed pest.
Arthur Daley

;D

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:)

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https://imgur.com/ZTMdg3B

"Fine for parking".. lol.

;D

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The Grand Canyon was founded by Neanderthal Man living in ancient Colorado region. The cave men would take a whiz at a certain watering location.

https://x.com/HumansNoContext/status/1856985968688992540

Frank wrote on Nov 15^th, 2024 at 10:28am:

https://x.com/HumansNoContext/status/1856985968688992540

;D ;D ;D

That's hilarious!

And it's sooooo much funnier than your Babylon Bee (fake news you can trust but sorry, no links) posts in the America section.

:)

https://x.com/gunsnrosesgirl3/status/1857876862988386339

Frank wrote on Nov 17^th, 2024 at 7:31am:

https://x.com/gunsnrosesgirl3/status/1857876862988386339

:o

Followed by...

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https://i.imgur.com/uTH8UpR.jpg

https://x.com/RealJamesWoods/status/1858909184923726201

:)

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steve
@bagshaw2112
Be careful today #snow

It snowed last night...
8:00 am: I made a snowman.

8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.

8:15 - So, I made a snow woman.

8:17 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.

8:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snow men instead.

8:22 - The transgender man..women...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.

8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.

8:28 - I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.

8:31 - The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be covered up .

8:40 - The Police arrived saying someone had been offended.

8:42 - The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.

8:43 - The council equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.

8:45 - TV news crew from BBC showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I replied "Snowballs" and am now called a sexist.

9:00 - I was on the News as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.

9:10 - I was asked if I have any accomplices. My children were taken by social services.

9:29 - Far left protesters offended by everything marched down the street demanding for me to be arrested.

By noon it all melted

Moral:

There is no moral to this story. It is what we have become, all because of snowflakes

https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSjbFLb91/

Gordon wrote on May 15^th, 2023 at 11:27am:

https://i.ibb.co/KhW8xkj/FB-IMG-1684024816676.jpg

Dear Lord, i nearly spat me teef out….  ;D

Oldy but never gets old …

.

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Don't want to know what happens at this festival.  :o

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Carl D wrote on Dec 8^th, 2024 at 7:37pm:

Don't want to know what happens at this festival.  :o

It's a paki thing.



https://scontent.fsyd7-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.6435-9/176084941_3760946160694142_3697619528340489429_n.jpg?_nc_cat=109&ccb=1-7&_nc_sid=127cfc&_nc_ohc=74PJ1eDrC98Q7kNvgHjRNsr&_nc_zt=23&_nc_ht=scontent.fsyd7-1.fna&_nc_gid=A0Sl0MMMXt0ewqQxnPw-Nsl&oh=00_AYBiul6CWFFvfMPcrrfPDb2k64IAzsh4Oyuue45XoOAgtQ&oe=677D03F9

:o

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Quick Life of Brian in two minutes - SBS world Movies... enjoy..

;D

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https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Ggr-sHMXcAA6GXz?.jpg

Jacinta vs Lisa Wilkinsons husband  ;D

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Sir Grappler Truth Teller OAM wrote on Jan 2^nd, 2025 at 7:29pm:

Quick Life of Brian in two minutes - SBS world Movies... enjoy..

Yeah I watched it ...... again.

Lost count of how many times now.

Pilot- "Centurion vhy do vey titter so?"
Cent - "ahh just some Jewish joke Sir. " 
Pilot -"Are vey wwragging me?"
Cent - "Oh no Sir".
;D 

;D

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https://images.newscientist.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/01/08104616/SEI_235160937.jpg

😆😆😆

;D

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A fairly common sight these days... I've experienced it myself on several occasions (usually a card in the letterbox or an email or text message).

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😆🤣😂

Another one.

Just for Frank.

(From here: https://www.elevenforum.com/t/funny-picture-thread.36/page-120#post-563166)

:)

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https://topwatchmart.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/02/1-202.jpg

https://topwatchmart.com/?p=2654&fbclid=IwY2xjawIeHBVleHRuA2FlbQIxMAABHbjzXmIPI8j_I2nJbQJUQbaM5sTsmGSyXurBiWd3brFaEU7BMERNQ5uOyQ_aem_grngtrBM5Fzgy-cZdCFI-Q

"The incident has also sparked a debate about gender dynamics in sports and how these interactions are perceived and managed. Intergender matches are already a topic of discussion within the MMA community, and this incident has only intensified these conversations."

I don't know about you, but I had to laugh....

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Gj1WZcrWwAAhpnm?.png

Bonus   lolz

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GjXb52OXQAAOyPQ?.jpg

No one is above lampooning. (Can I say that??)

😆😆

:o

Hope they keep a fire extinguisher nearby.

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Dang!  ;D

;D

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That must be a white male chauvinist pig.

I tool these and it made me laugh

https://i.ibb.co/q3fbzPMZ/20250221-153221.jpg
https://i.ibb.co/C3q5h2p0/20250221-153208.jpg

;D

I'm not even going to ask what was happening there.

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https://x.com/TheFigen_/status/1890458269757432046

[media width=500]https://youtu.be/f9sf8yu10FA[/media]

https://i.ibb.co/21fn6H2Z/Screenshot-20250228-184205-Tik-Tok.jpg

https://i.ibb.co/FLWhfv19/FB-IMG-1741498775345.jpg

;D

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https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-14490091/school-sign-hervey-bay.html

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lol.  ;D

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;D

Your local Home Depot keeping it spicy
https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fpreview.redd.it%2Fyour-local-home-depot-keeping-it-spicy-v0-05dsxkcxa5pe1.png%3Fwidth%3D640%26crop%3Dsmart%26auto%3Dwebp%26s%3D88b78e705bb94be41402cf1cf5bb31d0bf4e59d3

Now I understand my life:-

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https://i.imgur.com/ou9GW56.jpg

:)

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Ha!

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:o

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:)

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There's someone at the door, Maureen.

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Gpwd0i8aYAEOaEp?.jpg

;D

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tApGO4Kqq88

https://x.com/ClarksonsFarm1/status/1922610809806426321

;D

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;D

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Lewis recreating his favourite movie in Monaco   ;D

https://i.imgur.com/CwkqoOL.jpg

:o

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Oops.  :o

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;D

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https://i.imgur.com/pCVUhcL.jpeg

https://i.imgur.com/ZzOisyG.jpeg

;D ;D
All of the above.

https://i.imgur.com/cXq4OpB.jpeg

;D

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