There has been a lot of heavy religious debating lately, so to lower the tone even more. here is a good religious joke, which hopefully won't offend anyone.


There were 3 good arguments that Jesus could have been Black:

  1. He called everyone “brother”
  2. He liked Gospel
  3. He couldn’t get a fair trial.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:

  1. He went into His Fathers business.
  2. He lived at home until he was 33.
  3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his mother was sure he was God.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus could have been Italian:

  1. He talked with his hands.
  2. He had wine with every meal.
  3. He used olive oil.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus could have been a Californian:

  1. He never cut his hair.
  2. He walked around barefoot all the time.
  3. He started a new religion.

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus could have been Irish:

  1. He never got married.
  2. He was always telling stories.
  3. He loved green pastures.

But the most compelling evidence of all - 3 proofs that Jesus could have been a woman:

  1. He fed a crowd at a moment’s notice when there was no food.
  2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn’t get it.
  3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was more work to do.


Personally I think the jewish one is the funniest.

yes, I like the Italian one.

Then again, I like lots of Italian thngs !!

Is it true that Mary was only 13 when she had him?

No idea

Who would Know?
Historically there is no mention of him by any contemporary scholars or historians, from his supposed time and place of existence, so we must rely on texts written second, third and fourth hand, by others starting a hundred years after his death.

Certain historians regard Christian beliefs as being constructed by romans, from existing Mithran religious stories.

Unfortunately we may never know, thanks to some great fires which burnt some valuable books.
The moral? Don't let christians play with matches.

I've seen the website (Jesus Never Existed), but think it's totally simplistic to dismiss a huge body of evidence  just because it was part of scripture and associated writings.

I have little doubt that there was a historical Jesus Christ, and by all accounts, he was an inspirational and uncomplicated figure, and a man of peace, but he never once said he was a god himself.  

What a pity that his words have been twisted by so many, and so many atrocities have been committed in his name over the last 2000 years.

What you'll find on the site is a lot of half-truths and mockery of Christianity. The so-called history is not widely accepted.

"Christianity is the worst disaster in human history" ?

I mean - come on!  ;D Haven't they got something better to do?

mozzaok - "The moral? Don't let christians play with matches"


hahhaha, is easy to see why I so like athiests.

Hiya sprint, glad you didn't take offence, but that was never my intention, and you always seem to know that.
;D
When I do mean to be offensive, there really isn't any doubt about it. ;D

I agree muso, I think that there was probably a philosopher/holy man, named jesus, I just believe that his followers were most likely a lot like modern real estate agents, and thought his intellectual "property" needed talking up, hence the borrowing of Mithra's religious story, which they superimposed onto his.

I mean, if you don't know his past, a story of virgin birth, guiding stars, wise men, crucifiction et al, etc. all provable mithran religious stories, would make the property far more saleable.
Who wants to hear about a guy whose only sellable point is that he teaches love, kindness and understanding?
Not enough it seems.

Sprintcyclist wrote on Jun 18^th, 2008 at 8:59am:

mozzaok - "The moral? Don't let christians play with matches" hahhaha, is easy to see why I so like athiests.

You might find this strange, but I prefer most Christians to Atheists. Christopher Hitchens makes my skin crawl, probably more so than TV Evangelists.

Few people make me more repulsed than Televangelists, muso, but at the same time, I can find them immensely amusing.

I believe what sprint was referring to was the ability to not get over serious, and maintain a sense of humour about it.
I do not know the 'Hitchens' character to whom you refer, but anyone who cannot make fun of themselves, as well as others, can be a pain.

That's fine Mozzaok.
Say whatever you want.  
If something cannot be questioned, it's very questionable then, isn't it ??


I have heard of the mithran stories before.  Very interesting, isn't it ?

yes, prob a bit hard to sell,  "love, kindness and understanding?"
Esp in tougher times.
It's enough of a struggle to be loving in good times, let alone when a crop failure may mean starvation.
A hard theory to accept indeed.  Yet, it seems to work .

Not only that, but also 'turning the other cheek'.

I would be really happy if they stuck to love, kindness and understanding.

All the nicest religious people I know keep these principles as the central tenet of their belief, and it serves them, and society well.
It is when people go off searching texts for justifications to ignore these principles that religious folk get off track.

Actually, I don't think understanding is a fundamental principle to Christianity. I think it's the opposite - they are taught to reject human understanding in favour of the Lord's word.

Love thy neighbour as thyself.

Understanding is implied, otherwise it would not be possible to even attempt to follow that rule.

Sure there are degrees like in all things, most people are not so strict on all the commandments, or so literal in their interpretation of bible stories.
Only the fundamentalists preach that form of extremism, which make the slackest christians, usually the best christians, because they do not put equal emphasis on treating homosexuals as abominations before god, as they do on attempting to love their neighbour.

I like the one,

"Don't judge others, or you will be judged by the same measure."

Same sentiment as "Let he who has not sinned cast the first stone."

Really puts the emphasis back onto onesself. Which is uncomfortable !!!!

Considering the violent times that the Bible and its many versions came from, it is a suprisingly peaceful and at times quite insightful peace of literature.

Quote:

What was Jesus?

An honourable Jew who spoke out against Zionist ways.