To be truly respectful of your partner it is my contention that they must be kept aware of the truth. That is things should not be hidden from them- particularly things such as unfaithfulness which would make a big difference to them, but also your changign preferences and ideals and personality. If one does nto keep one's partner aware of the truth then they do nto have an accurate view of where they are standing and that is not only a very disrespectful thing to do to someone, it also allows the ground to fall from beneath their feet if a lie is found out...

A blokes point of view

Thought women always reckoned they perceived everything ?  An involved partner should be aware of what is happening.
Where is the mystery, if everything is boringly written down ?

I don't want to hear every nuisance of a possibility of a slight alteration of a preference.

Sprintcyclist wrote on Aug 10^th, 2007 at 11:48pm:

A blokes point of view Thought women always reckoned they perceived everything ?  An involved partner should be aware of what is happening. Where is the mystery, if everything is boringly written down ? I don't want to hear every nuisance of a possibility of a slight alteration of a preference.

If your wife was having doubts about your relationship or thinking about starting one with another man you wouldn't want to know?

She was and I knew .

If a relationship needs saving, it isn't worth saving. It has to stand on its own two feet.

Sprintcyclist wrote on Aug 11^th, 2007 at 9:03am:

She was and I knew . If a relationship needs saving, it isn't worth saving. It has to stand on its own two feet.

Absolutely agree with that Sprint..life is too short to spend 10 yrs in counselling to save something destined to fail anyway.

We have but one life...do not waste it with the wrong person.

Sprintcyclist wrote on Aug 11^th, 2007 at 9:03am:

She was and I knew . If a relationship needs saving, it isn't worth saving. It has to stand on its own two feet.

I think one is entitled to know rather than live with a delusion. That is all I am saying. I appreciate the point you make too, but it is a subsequent one.

'nother good point connie.
I would have preferred that too. In hindsight, it is easy.

Often the "deciever" may "feel" the change, but be unable to know what it is, let alone say it.