Why have a "relationship"?

Seems that it ends in pain and humiliation.

Sprintcyclist wrote on Apr 30^th, 2007 at 2:14pm:

Why have a "relationship"? Seems that it ends in pain and humiliation.

Sprint ,

This topic has been here for a while now and I should have got onto it earlier..sorry!

I hope your situation is easier now..

If you want to talk about it....?

Is just a question I raised.

Seems people discuss relationship as regards only the bad stuff about them.

So, why bother ? If it is only bad stuff.

Why have one?

Sprintcyclist wrote on May 27^th, 2007 at 9:56pm:

Is just a question I raised. Seems people discuss relationship as regards only the bad stuff about them. So, why bother ? If it is only bad stuff. Why have one?

Well the bad stuff needs to be sorted to make it more about good stuff.

Miscommunication is a biggie and talking and never letting the lines break down is very important.

When the lines breakdown..and we stop talking a relationship deterorates very quickly.spelt that wrong I know.

I know you need relationships sprint- thats why we should have them . Because they nourish us and let us be ourselves and be loved in spite and because of it.

We need them- they fulfill us, make us secure, give us happiness, make life mean something apart from possessions and 9-5, make us feel valued, allow us to give love. That is when they are at their best. Even at their worst they give us a base point outside our own perception of reality- some connection.

It is better to live than die and to try than to give up and to love and lose rather than never love at all.

We have to feel secure and fulfilled within ourselves before we can have a successful relatonship.  There is no point relying on someone else to fill that empty space.  Yes we can get comfort and pleasure from some relationships, but it will only come back to bite you if you expect the other person to give you what you need.

If one person feels they are giving more than the other - the relationship won't last, unless they reach a bargaining position eg. I'll put up with having sex with you if you keep me supplied with a great wardrobe - or something to that effect.

Even so - unless the relationship is equal from the beginning, one person will start to feel resentful eventually.

good observations mantra and connie.